


Even if it's Only Until Tomorrow

by FluffyGlitterPantsDragon, omgluciferlover



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bad Puns, Blood and Gore, Canon-Compliant as much as possible, Characters play D&D, Deckerstar Big Bang 2019, Dorks, Ella is a Deckerstar shipper, F/M, Fluff, Gaming, Happy Ending, Hints of Dan/Maze, Hopeful Ending, Humor, Innuendo, POV Alternating, Poor Dan Espinoza, Post-Season/Series 04, Role-Playing Game, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-02
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2020-10-05 08:27:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 25,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20485856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FluffyGlitterPantsDragon/pseuds/FluffyGlitterPantsDragon, https://archiveofourown.org/users/omgluciferlover/pseuds/omgluciferlover
Summary: Lucifer is back home after a few months of absence. He’s back at work, mostly Devilishly functional but generally uncommunicative. The Luci-crew decide to get together at Chloe's for a game night to have a good time and reconnect with each other. Ella hasn't flexed her DMing muscles lately and volunteers to run the game module. Charlie and Linda show up and instigate fluff. Shenanigans and angst also happen.Violence and gore tags are for things the characters do in their POV.Less than half of the story takes place as the game as it is played out. My heartfelt goal is to make this fun to read for non-D&D players. When they’re playing, a lot of action is happening and I try not to stop for rules or die rolls.





	1. Game Night

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Just_Mad_Enough and GlitterSkullFairy for beta-ing! 
> 
> Thank you to my awesome artist partner, whose Tumblr can be found here: http://omgluciferlover.tumblr.com  
And Twitter here: http://omgluciferlover.tumblr.com
> 
> Art link to the comic here:  
https://omgluciferlover.tumblr.com/post/187441297443/this-lucifer-comic-is-based-on-the-fanfic-even-if
> 
> They have graciously been hard at work creating awesome comic panels for my story. Which will be posting over this week! I'd been wanting to do a Lucifer plays D&D for a while now, and while this story is half that, the other half is stuff happening around it. Charlie turns up halfway through and lots of fluff happens. 
> 
> This story swaps back and forth between the POV of Lucifer characters and the POV of their D&D characters. The entirety of this fic is meant to be enjoyed even if the reader has no more than the general idea of what D&D is- a dice rolling, character-driven game in sessions of treasure hunting and monster killing. A very basic example is online World of Warcraft but at a table. Each POV change is obvious and happens with line breaks - it will never blend together nor will Lucifer get sucked in or some crap like that. Credit to my artist for suggesting telling the parts of the game story from the game characters POV, I originally wasn't going to switch after the first time, but they pointed out it would be pretty boring to watch the game through the filter of Lucifer and suffer through their dice rolls and rules lawyering, so instead we jump right in. 
> 
> I play 3.5 myself and I won't do that to you or Ella, thus 5e here. I also play a high-level wizard, which no one should ever do without spreadsheets. I'm not kidding. And honestly, shouldn’t even be done, ever. You do not want to see my equipment/scroll lists.
> 
> I stick to the rules as much as possible/convenient, but I do break them sometimes. Know that it's for storytelling purposes and I may or may not (I did) steal stuff from games I've run or played in. (ToEEcoughHarrummph). The Lucifer characters start out at level 2, but I’m not keeping track of their xp or equipment or stats. Say what you want about bards, they can get stupid later on.
> 
> I don't want to bog down the fic with unnecessary rules, and hopefully I don't. I really hope non-gamers enjoy reading this.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Luci-crew have their pre-made characters out and ready to go. Ella has already gone over the basics and other rules and they jump right into a game session. They get into it pretty quickly, and sometimes stop and see how reality is going too.

It is a dark and stormy night.

Stark shadows jump and bite at the walls in a flickering dance made by the fireplace and lantern light. The wind howled, throwing enough air down the chimney to cause the fire to flinch wildly in protest. Rain sometimes blows at severe angle, striking the window panes hard enough to sound like nails bouncing on a hot stove. The weather, while unseasonal, is also unlikely to be the herald of bad portents, but one never knew for sure until a hungry dragon turned up in one's backyard. It could just as easily be bad weather and nothing more.

Either way, one paid attention to portents, regardless of the source. 

The proprietor and owner of the inn leaned on the bar counter listlessly. His stomach lurched as he considered their options for the night. Either way, they'd had no customers in days. A dragon might even be a nice change. Or at least interesting.

Even an irate red dragon would have trouble burning anything down tonight.

The wayside inn hosted travelers most evenings, but today had not been a day for anyone to be about, save the very determined.

Apparently, there were no very determined about either. So far tonight, nothing moved except the owner and his help, who both made judicious use of the beer taps. With no indication that anything had changed - at least to him - the woman flinched and sharply turned her head to the front door. He followed her lead, watching and waiting. A tense moment passes. 

The front door flies open with a crash and two people fumble into the otherwise patron-free establishment. As expected, water drips off the planes of their armor, or is soaked through their traveling cloaks. A clanging tangle of armor, belts and packs, swords and other sheathed weapons come in with them, flinging streams of water off in all directions. 

They make a racket jarring enough to wake the dead, nearly literally, but their movements are unhurried once inside. ‘Bedraggled’ would be a very polite term for how they look._ But at least they aren’t running from anything _, he thinks as they shut the door behind them wearily. Lucifer dislikes it when monsters visit his bed and breakfast.

The innkeeper - a handsome gentleman in well-kept leather with short blond hair and blue eyes - tilts his head forward. He watches them, annoyed at the amount of _ outside _ they’re getting slopped _ inside _all over the previously clean, wood panel floors. His bartender leans on the counter with a facial expression that’s probably identical to the one for experiencing constipation. With a growl, she calls out, "cloak hooks by the door! Use 'em!"

A response came from the woman, "sorry!" The two humans, male and female - wore hand-me-down heavy plate armor. And not from the same source. It fits them well enough but no one would think it to be magically enhanced, even at a distance. They strip off their sodden matched cloaks, bearing sigils of the God they serve. They scuff their boots to remove as much mud as they can at the threshold before tromping to the bar. The innkeeper licks his teeth at the holy symbols around their necks but doesn’t comment on them just yet. He knows that the deity they served actually does give more than half a shit about their existence - or so it’s said - and would be unlikely to bring trouble. Lucifer has never been a fan of the gods in general. His own magic comes from luck and skill, not the pantheon. 

The woman smiled with friendly, grateful eyes as she removed her helmet. “My friend and I are looking for rooms tonight. Separate rooms, please, if you have them. And, uhm. May Lathander's blessings be upon you.”

He relaxed instantly, smiling at her smile in return. “Detective! You know my home is your home. All you have to do is ask. Back Lasher or whomever can keep his blessings to himself." He nods decisively. 

She stared back at him, looking pole-axed.

* * *

Ella groaned loudly. “Lucifer, you aren’t _ Lucifer_, remember? I mean, you are, but you aren’t _ here. _ Do you need me to go over it _ again_?” She tried to keep her tone patient. He was completely new to this, after all, but most of them were.

She smiled secretly to herself, controlling the instinctive tug of her lips lest they betray her. _ Game face, Ella! _ The next thing out of her mouth was something she _ may _ have encouraged Chloe to do with her character. She pointed across Dan at her friend, ”After all, Chloe isn’t ‘Detective Chloe Decker,’ she’s Kira Lightbringer.”

Lucifer started as if struck by lightning. 

Chloe shrugged innocently, but smiled warmly. “What? she’s a paladin. She has a thing for light.”

“You know, historically, paladins and other ‘holy’ men hunt down evil and destroy it. They're often labeled fanatics for good reasons."

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing there’s nothing evil here. No smiting required today. I like to think Kira is more enlightened than most of her counterparts.”

Dan cut an eye at her, folding his arms over his plain blue Henley. “Does that mean you’re playing a pacifist… _ paladin_?”

“Oh, she will hunt down evil and kill it. When she finds it. Which she hasn’t yet."

That earned a sigh from Dan and a suppressed smirk from Ella. She didn't care. Chloe was going to find a way to get it through Lucifer's thick skull that she needed him. She'd take any opportunity that presented itself. Hopefully without wrecking the game in the process.

Her partner looked from one scribbled upon sheet on the table to another. He was lost in concentration and missed the last bit. He finally looked up at her, “well then, _ Kira._ Yes, I have lodgings...?” he looked at Ella with eyebrows drawing together.

“You don’t know her yet. It's up to you. You can be sold out of vacancies if you want to, and turn these poor, soaked fools away and back out into the rain.”

He gave her his best 'exasperated devil' look, glancing hard at Chloe. “But she’s right there! How do I not know her?"

Dan softly put his head down on the table surface.

Trixie giggled. “Pretend it’s your first day running LUX and you don't know anyone."

The Forensic Scientist cleared her throat. “Are you sure you don't want to pick another name for your character?" She put on a bland expression that was at odds with her _ My Little Pony _ shirt, displaying ponies hugging each other. "Didn’t any of your brothers or sisters have a nickname for you that you could use?”

Dan peeked up at Lucifer from where his face rested on the table. “You have _ more _ brothers and sisters? Did you grow up in a cult setting or something?”

Amenadiel scoffed. "Of course, not-"

Chloe rolled her eyes and cut him off. “You could call it that. How about ‘Lucas’? Like an undercover assignment name at work, so we know when we’re talking to you instead of your character?”

Dan responded with heavy sarcasm, "right, because he has such a great track record at performing undercover."

Ella muttered, "that’s what she said," earning a _ look _ from Dan. She turned to Lucifer, "still a really good example though."

The Devil scoffed, looking remarkably like a cat that smelled something bad, “well, if I _ must _, I’ll respond to ‘Lucas.’”

Ella relaxed. “Great! Lucas, a few rando's have come into your inn. What’s it called, anyway?”

He sucked in a short breath, glancing down at his sheet. “I suppose I can’t call it LUX, can I?” He popped the cuffs of his purple button-up and rolled the sleeves back.

Ella’s neck twitched as if reconsidering, watching his arms. “It’d be better for our collective sanity if you came up with something fresh…“

“Fine.” he shot a quick glance at Trixie, discarding the first thing that popped into his brain, in light of the spawn’s presence. "Is there any relevant time period or place this _ game _ has in common with human history?"

"More like fantasy settings. You've seen the _ Lord of the Rings _ movies right? That architecture works pretty well."

“Alright. Is..._ my _…inn two stories?”

“Sure. It can look like almost anything you want. But Lucas isn’t as wealthy as Lucifer. By a lot, so as a moderately successful owner, it’s basically the _ Prancing Pony _ for size. No hobbits here though."

He grinned at Chloe. “The ‘Double Decker Inn’, then. How’s that?”

Dan rolled his eyes and Chloe giggled.

Ella nodded with a smirk. “Sure, that’s fine. No problem," she really didn't have an issue with it. A good Game Master is all about balancing fun and rules. "Kira and Steve, you two arrived first, you’ve stabled your horses next door and the rain is still coming down hard. You've been riding together for a few days already on your trip and are pretty done by now.”

Chloe looked at Amenadiel, “Steve?”

“Ella said to pick a name you like, and we've been watching the _ Avengers _ movies.”

Dan muttered, “Paladins.”

Ella elbowed him in the ribs. “Kira is the Paladin, Steve is the Cleric.”

Dan rubbed his side vigorously. “What was that for? Captain America is totally a Paladin."

“_You _ aren’t here yet either.”

Lucifer looked pinched. “Yes, he is.”

Dan pointed at his representing figure on the table, off the mat - the metal car from a couple of Monopoly games they scavenged for characters. “_He _ isn’t.” He was playing a wizard and wore a pointed Harry Potter hat provided by Trixie, at her insistence. He had the bearing of someone who knew full well he looked ridiculous but unable to turn down his daughter. He gave his sort-of-friend-again a pained look. “Honestly, this isn’t that hard, man.”

Trixie stuck her tongue out at her father. “Be nice!” She turned her face up at Lucifer. “It’s okay, I’ll help you when you need it.”

Ella nodded, “you’re next. You come in right after the two disciples of Lathander. You came in from the other direction, followed by the wizard. You two met on the road and know each other by now."

Trixie pushed her Monopoly T-Rex up to the bar, towards Maze's figure - the terrier. 

Maze crossed her arms on the table, regarding Trixie. “How much money do you have on you?”

She frowned at a corner of her sheet. “A few silver coins. What can I get?”

"Anything you want, shorty."

"I'm not short!"

Lucifer perked up, “It’s on the house anyway, child. Dragonperson. Welcome to my damp home."

Ella groaned again. “You can’t just give random people alcohol. You’ll go out of business.”

“Remind me to tell you sometime about _ real _ dragons. They're all gone now, of course. A free drink for the lovely scaled lady just this one time?”

“Okay...for some reason, the innkeeper is giving you a beer. Maze, what’s your character’s name?”

“Demon-Face.”

Dan blinked.

She looked between Maze and Dan, then shrugged. “Okay, uh, please describe… Demon-Face for your fellow game players. Guys, the woman at the bar slams the free beer on the counter and she looks like…”

“I can look like anything right? She’s in a black leather outfit. And she, uh, has black hair and ice-blue eyes. She’s pretty hot.”

“No problem. What’s your charisma, DF?”

Maze looked down at her sheet. “10.”

“Okay, that's considered average, so DF just thinks she’s hot, but that doesn’t mean she’s not skilled - Rogues don’t need a lot of charisma. She probably has a bunch of better skills to make up for it. Like, dexterity?”

“Oh, yeah, she has that in spades. And so do I.”

“So, she moves super smooth, and could probably put the mug on the counter with her feet without spilling a drop.”

“I’ve actually done that before.”

Dan twitched. “You’re. Uh, that...” He glanced across the table at Trixie and shut his mouth.

Maze smirked.

Chloe resisted the urge to pat her ex-husband on the shoulder. The most difficult thing about today was knowing things he didn’t know. A lot of things. It had been nearly a year since she found out and Lucifer had been back home for over a month now. 

It had taken most of a month to get Dan to stop throwing dirty looks when Lucifer came back to work after being utterly _ gone _for nearly two whole months. During that dark period, Dan had been her shoulder to cry on - he and the tribe had been essential for her mental health, even if she couldn't talk to him or Ella about why he was gone.

She didn’t know then that Lucifer would even be back at all, but she never gave up hope, even if it had worn thin. 

It was a good thing she hadn't told anyone he died or that she had claimed some other permanent missing status. It had been difficult enough to reassure Dan that he hadn't just run away and abandoned them. 

You know, _ again._

He'd had to do it. They were still not exactly _ together _yet - Lucifer wasn't completely convinced he was actually free of Hell and refused to give her false hope. She, in the meantime, grumbled and went through quite a few sets of batteries. Chloe sighed internally. It would work out, eventually. He still hasn’t explained what happened.

Whatever it was, it left him on pins and needles. 

Whatever it was, she intended to find out every detail.

At work, the only thing that let Dan be able to tolerate Lucifer, at least at first, was the fact he came back looking more than a bit _ haunted _. Lucifer was still having some trouble feeling comfortable in his own skin, so she jumped on the suggestion of the group game night by Ella to re-expose Lucifer to loved ones and friends in a quiet setting.

Ella eagerly volunteered to run a D&D game, which wasn’t the first thing that came to mind for Chloe, but it could work. Trixie had been wanting to try it out anyway, and she was at a good age for at least an introductory game, at 11 now. Ella promised her up and down that Trixie would have a great time, and even gifted her daughter a full set of clear pink dice with sparkles in them. She added to Chloe that she would pull punches and make sure Trixie's character would be _ unlikely _ to fall dead. 

Everyone else was free game.

Chloe knew Dan used to play, even witnessed it a time or two in passing, and she knew he needed to get back out of his own shell too. He tried not to sound too interested when he overheard Chloe and Ella discussing it at work, over a crime scene. Ella, despite a smidge of weirdness that followed the two of them around agreed it might be a good idea to try and re-establish them as ‘just’ friends. 

And it probably was. 

There was no good reason to loop Dan into the _ knowing _ club at the time, but now it just seemed awkward. Linda and and maybe Eve both were due to turn up to watch the game, tilting the ratio of people who knew vs. ones who didn't even further against him.

Chloe felt sympathetic too, but there was no way of knowing if he’d react well, and he hadn’t exactly been the most stable over the last year. It was understandable, with everything he'd worked through. But finding out that your sometimes improv buddy is an angel probably won’t help his mind-space.

Dan did seem to be in an overall better place, even if he looked itchy at knowing and spending time with people burdened with odd names who often behaved strangely. He still sometimes glanced suspiciously between Lucifer and his brother when they were in the same room together as if the last few years all had been just some kind of massive practical joke played on him personally. 

But he was trying. If nothing else, he could be at least as stubborn as her. 

The only other option was to cut him out of their lives, out of his daughter’s life, for his own protection of sanity. But Chloe had seen, very personally, where the road of 'smothering protection' led. And maybe she could help him out when - not if - it came time.

Dad knew she could have used someone other than the dick of a priest to talk to. 

She shook her head to clear it and focused on the plastic mat on the table in front of her, crowded inside the ‘inn’ with little figures and more bits and drawings that represented the inn, a stable, the road and wooded surrounding area. The closest stable wall was five map squares away from the main building with horses drawn as fat ovals. Inside the lines of the inn, At the start of the game, Ella had drawn rough tables and chairs, a long bar, a back door, and a second room behind the bar. 

Lucifer praised her stick figure style accuracy.

Ella picked up Dan’s car and placed it just inside the doorway of the inn. “Okay, Dan, Your horse is stabled and you're inside, just behind your new friend. There's a few humans, the female Dragonborn, with copper dragon features-” Trixie smiled with all her teeth, “the shifty looking bartender - Maze - an elf, the pally and cleric, and last but not least, the roguishly handsome innkeeper, a half-elf, who is entertaining his guests. Lucifer, what class are you playing?”

“Do I have to tell them?”

Dan leaned forward to sneak a look at his sheet, but Lucifer slapped it up against his chest and shook his finger. “Naughty, Detective!”

Ella shook her head, “you don't _ have _ to,” she cocked her head and added to Dan, “_however, _he's hard to look away from - he's extremely handsome and commanding of presence. You would bet money that he's got super high charisma.”

Lucifer preened.

Dan eyed Lucifer. "Unless there are two paladins at the table, that makes him a sorcerer. Can I do a _ sense motive_?”

“You can roll for it, but it doesn't really work on party members. He counts as one even though the adventure hasn't started yet.”

“Right. Pass then. His check is probably hard to beat anyway."

Ella blew at her bangs. "Do not make me give _ you _ the 'you don't know that' talk too, Espinoza."

He looked properly chagrined. "Sorry."

Maze tapped her fingertips on the table. “I'm playing a rogue. I like stabbing things.” 

"I'm sure there will be plenty of things to stab. Later."

She looked over at Dan. “What'll it be?”

He picked up his top sheet and cleared his throat. “Hello! I'm-”

“Don't care. Order something. Quit eyeballing my man.”

Ella's eyebrows pinched, “Maze…”

Dan snapped, “I'm _ not _ eyeballing him. My character is straight. Also.”

“Well, in that case, I have a room upstairs...”

“Maze! Trixie is here!”

She grumbled. “Well,_ I _ had one. When I used to live here. We'll see how long you hold out,” to Ella, ”can I convince him, _ Master_?”

Ella rolled her eyes. “Again, party members. That part is pure roleplaying. If he or his character doesn't want to do something roleplay based, there's nothing you can do to change his mind.” Lucifer, immediately looked intrigued at a new challenge. Ella waved, “let's get back on track, okay? You sell Dan’s character a beer. Dan, what’s - I’m assuming ‘his’ - name?”

Dan sat up and tapped his name card in front of him. They all had one with both their real names and their character’s on each tented card. “Amrellon. My family is from the other side of the continent but I came here to go to Wizard Academy or whatever it is here, so I live here but I’m basically by myself. I have red hair and green eyes. I don’t have any armor, just plain robes-”

Lucifer smirked. “A dress?”

“_Robes._” For some reason, Amenadiel rolled his eyes dramatically. Dan folded his arms on the table and addressed Lucifer, "your character isn't in a suit, you know."

"Not a dress either. Never fear, the dark ages weren't all dark, plenty of fashion to go around. Thankfully the game book illustrations seem light on hose. I could turn a leg when I needed to, however."

He didn't suppress a snort, "I'm sure."

"Care to dance sometime, Detective? I'm quite skilled."

"Nope. I'm good." Dan grumped. “I take my beer and go back a few tables.” 

“No need to get testy.”

“I think I’m gonna leave some space between me and DF.”

Ella wrote something down behind her paper wall. “By the way, three more randos have come inside and have sat down in the back, talking quietly. They're as wet as everyone else here."

Lucifer looked at her expectantly. “And?”

“They're NPCs, non-party characters. No one here is running them, that's my job. They might be background decorations or they could be plot fuel collateral. You don't know yet.” She put three red Monopoly houses in a back corner of the drawn room with a pointed look. “You can go see to your new guests, or go talk to the ones who came in first,” and since this was Lucifer she added, “or nothing at all.”

He nodded, very deliberately picked up his mini and put it near ‘Kira’ and ignored the new people for now. “Hello, there, m'lady. Broth-_ Steve_. How fare you?” He cleared his throat and commented, "if I can do Shakespeare, I can do this. And I mean that literally and figuratively."

Chloe grinned. “Hello, um. My friend and I will be headed out again in the morning."

Amenadiel straightened up in his chair, trying to look important. “Yes. Uhm. Also, we’re on a mission from God.”

Lucifer did a spit-take with his flask. “What?”

“Lathander. That is. Kira and I are followers of Lathander,” he flipped his sheet over, looking at suggestions from Ella she wrote down earlier, “We were summoned by the church in Greyhawk. Some...undead? Need to be dealt with outside the city.”

Mazikeen muttered, “no such thing.” She thought about it then added, “not since the Black Plague anyway.”

Lucifer shrugged. “Oh, well, I can take care of that myself.”

“Arrrrgggh. _ Lucifer _ could, I guess." Ella looked over him doubtfully, "Lucas definitely can’t. Not on his own."

Dan grumbled, “I would _ love _ to see Lucifer fight actual undead.”

The scary woman grinned, “You bet your butt you would. He’s not supposed to take out humans, but undead and demon meat-suits are an entirely different matter.”

“Demon _ what_?”

“Okay, as much as I want to follow up on that, stay on target, people.” Ella straightened her own notes with loud shuffling, “so, Kira, the innkeeper has your attention. And _ Lucas,_ remember that your character class wouldn’t allow you to do well haring off on your own. Of course, if Lucas _ wants _ to run off into the hills and just get killed, he can do that too, but you’ll need a new character and have to introduce him or her all over again.”

“_Fine_. Detective Kira, far be it from me to interfere in your _ investigation, _but if you’d like to stay, we can make arrangements.”

Trixie bounced in her chair. “Can I help? With the killing later?”

Ella blanched, but Amenadiel picked it up quicker than Chloe. “Why, yes, you look like a capable fighter, we could use your help on our mission. Would you like to hear more about Lathander?”

“That depends, is he anything like _ Dad_?”

Dan blinked. Again. “What?”

“Not _ you_, dad. _ Their Dad._”

Chloe winced internally. There had been no fooling her daughter, never had been, and she had been picking up words and turns-of-phrases from Lucifer over the last few years. Not that it wasn't pretty adorable. Usually.

Amenadiel shrugged. “Well, if Lathander was real, he’d have some things in common with God, like a love of light. What’s your name?”

Lucifer gave his brother a dirty look.

She grinned brightly. “My name is Penelope! But you can call me Penny. I’m a Dragonborn fighter with copper scales. I’m really tall and strong, and I can spit acid!”

Lucifer appeared slightly impressed. Dan was still processing the _ Dad _ thing.

Ella echoed her smile. “Great! You’re almost a whole adventuring party now. Demon-Face, make me a _ perception _ check!”

Maze jumped, looking around for sudden danger, then quickly down at her sheet with a less than subtle snarl. She picked up her pewter 20-sided die with a careful glance at Ella and got a reassuring nod in return. She gingerly dropped it and it rolled one or two times before coming to a rest. “17?”

“That’s good. You notice that the new people in the back of the room seem to be arguing quietly about something. They’re all really tense and it’s getting a little heated.”

She shrugged. 

“Also...they haven’t bought any food or drink yet.”

“Ooooh, loitering punks. Imma go throw them out. What about the other guy in the back? Dan?”

“You’ve seen him around - he lives in Greyhawk and sometimes stops here.” Dan was chewing his lip, so Ella added to him, “Do you want to do anything?”

He scratched his neck. “Do I see, uh, Demon-Face storming across the room to bounce them?”

“Oh yeah, everyone does.”

“Did I overhear the group of characters talking - Kira and them?”

“Look at you, trying to be all in character! I’m giving you a point for that.” She had Dan do a perception check too, following up with, “you can tell they’re talking to each other in a friendly way, but that’s really all you get.”

He rubbed his hands together. “Can I cast _ Detect Magic _ on the new guys?”

“Oh yeah, those guys totally have a magic aura of some kind. DF, you're on them. They all stop talking to each other and look at you. The one closest to you is all gruff and defensive. One of them stuffs something in his pocket and all of them look like they want to fight."

Maze smiled. "Good. I punch the one in front in the face."

Ella rubbed her eyes. "Anyone want to do something first? Lucas? Your employee is about to punch someone."

“No, I love watching Maze punch people.”

Dan shrugged, “me too. She's talented."

Maze grinned at Dan with her teeth. “Right back you, fight buddy."

Trixie cocked her head at her dad and gave Maze a calculating look. 

Lucifer leaned back to smile at Maze. “Isn’t she though? Half the things she learned, she did all herself. I barely had to train her once I took her on as my head torturer and right-hand Demon.”

Dan said, “you know, when you came back, I was kind of hoping you might start making more sense. So what happens?”

“Roll for initiative!” Ella pulled out a smaller dry erase board and poised her hand over it, clutching a felt-tip pen. “Gimme your numbers, people. DF is already starting trouble.”

Maze tapped her foot impatiently while they worked out who went first. She pushed her blouse sleeves back. “Yeah, but it’s three of them vs like, seven of us.”

“Actually, right now, it’s just you against the three of them. The new people may not want to get involved in your fight. Lucas might, but he’s across the room and behind the bar.”

She cracked her neck, “that’s fine. I’ve kicked more than three butts at once.”

“Well, DF has ‘advantage’ since they definitely were not expecting you to attack before talking.”

“I use a sneak attack to flatten him.”

Ella blinked in surprise.

“What. I read the rules. You have to know what the rules are before you break ‘em. First law of Hell. Do I do it or not?”


	2. Bar Fight!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot thickens. Things get set on fire.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nerd Alert.
> 
> Also, thanks for the awesome comments so far! I love you guys!
> 
> ETA: Doin' an add -  
Character breakdown chart: D&D Characters and their tokens
> 
> Ella = GM  
Lucifer = Lucas / Bard / Half-Elf (innkeeper) - top hat  
Maze = Demon-Face / Rogue / Elf (barmaid/assassin) - terrier  
Amenadiel = Steve / Cleric / Human (on a mission from God) - cat  
Dan = Amrellon / Wizard / Human (wandering around at the wrong time) - car  
Trixie = Penelope / Fighter / Dragonborn - copper (looking for work) - T-rex  
Chloe = Kira (she loved Dark Crystal) / Paladin / Human (Traveling with Steve) - shoe
> 
> Other - Spells used - Wizard:  
https://5thsrd.org/spellcasting/spells/shocking_grasp/  
https://5thsrd.org/spellcasting/spells/detect_magic/  
https://5thsrd.org/spellcasting/spells/magic_missile/  
https://5thsrd.org/spellcasting/spells/find_familiar/  
https://5thsrd.org/spellcasting/spells/mending/  
https://5thsrd.org/spellcasting/spells/prestidigitation/

Kira turned in her chair to find the source of the commotion. The bartender stormed across the room but she doesn’t see a cause for it. 

The first of the three men hit the floor, knees first with a painful _ thud _ as DF’s fist impacts his nose, which gives off a grotesquely crunching noise and a spray of blood for the extra bit of flair. Banging his head on the table as he falls, he crumples in a daze. The other two stand, shove their chairs away and face the aggressive elf. They loom over her threateningly by a good foot each but she doesn’t blink or back down.

Kira and her companion exchange glances and stand as one unit. She draws her sword, unsure how this had started, but she’s going to end it regardless. She tenses, ready to move if one of the other men make a run for it. Whatever the hell is happening she’s going to need a member of both parties to question.

There’s a moment where everyone is watching each other, breathing and poised to strike.

Piano notes shatter the tense silence-

* * *

Ella stopped him, "there's no piano, buddy. Sorry."

He huffed. "But _ your _ book says I can have _ any _ instrument I want. I _ want _ a piano. What’s the point of a fantasy world where _ magic _ exists but they arbitrarily leave out _ pianos? _"

Dan pinched his nose, utterly ignoring Lucifer’s point. "A _bard?_ _Really_?"

“Is there a problem, Daniel? And really, while we’re on the subject of fantasy, there are absolutely _ no _ instructions for spell casting. Those books,” he gestured off-handedly at the short stack by Ella’s elbow, “make it sound like I can just snap my fingers and say something like ‘_we’re not in Kansas anymore _’ and I can cast a spell.”

Amenadiel looked amused. “Luci, you can’t put _ real spells _ in a book that kids might play with. Do you want someone to try to summon Maze out from under us?”

Dan started to argue with Lucifer, although he actually did have a valid point. However, he wasn’t used to _ Amenadiel _ being the crazy brother that made no sense so that bit threw him off enough that he missed his cue.

Ella put her paper screen down so she could see them better. She took in a calming breath and addressed Lucifer. “All that matters in the game is the _ intent _ to cast a spell, plus components. If we had to stop for rituals every encounter, and if I had to make sure you do them right on top of that, it would slow the game down _ a lot._” She flipped to the relevant entry in the handbook for his class, reading quickly before continuing, "okay, _ technically_, yes it does say you can have ‘any’ three instruments. But there aren't any pianos in this game, and no other more recently invented instruments either. I mean, I _ guess _ you can have an organ here at your inn, but you can't travel with it."

The Devil totally didn’t whine. “At least I can have multiple; one can stay here and two are light enough to carry. Since you seem to be so concerned about having travel-ready musical instruments.”

“Luce...did you actually read all the character descriptions first? Or did you just decide on the first character option you saw?”

He huffed, “Either. Both. Clearly I _ should _ be a bard.”

“You can choose anything you want, even a fighter. Your character doesn’t _ have _ to be like you.”

“But that’s what I want to play.”

She gave up. “Okay, then. The bard class requires an instrument to play musically invoked spells. You can’t drag an organ with you if you decide to leave your inn-” They both looked at each other as if considering ways it was actually _ possible._ Ella shook her head, putting away thoughts of carts and wagons. Lucifer just said, “can you imagine what that would sound like on the back of a horse-drawn cart? It would be horrifying.”

“And now I have an idea for an evil bard bad guy. Just not this game. Thank you, I think.”

He considered the open book in front of Ella. “I’m sticking with it. All ‘classes’ are good options, correct?”

“Absolutely. Just be aware of how few hit points you have, okay? Try not to go charging into danger, because I won’t protect you from your own decisions.”

Dan coughed unsubtly. “I have a feeling we’re going to need a new bard soon.”

Ella closed the handbook, addressing everyone, “I’d prefer that you don’t just make a repeat of your character if you die. There are some exceptions, but I want all of you to think about a backup character. Full party kills are possible here.”

Chloe inclined her head at Lucifer, “What’s to stop him or any of us from screwing up that badly? On purpose or by accident?”

Dan answered cheekily, “if both Lucas and Amrellon die, _ I’ll _ play a bard next. And I’ll do it better.”

If Lucifer had been drinking anything, he would have spit it out on the table. _ “I beg your pardon!"_

He grinned challengingly, “prove me wrong then.”

“I will!”

Ella snapped her fingers at Lucifer, “hey, so an organ here at your inn, and?”

He crossed his arms, giving a last appraising look at Dan. "An organ is _ completely _ out of the question. Bugger. What else is there then?"

Ella tilted her head. "Lutes are common, or just about anything handheld but nothing modern. Or you can have flutes, lyres, dulcimers, violins, I think bagpipes are an option-"

Dan made a face like he just bit into a lemon. "Dear God, no."

"Wrong deity." Lucifer thought about it. "Really? Even imaginary bagpipes? I guess I should give you more credit. Or less for being intolerant of instruments that aren't physically here - I’m not sure yet. As much as I now want to pick bagpipes just out of spite, I tend to agree; I very much prefer not to keep my mouth preoccupied, in this case. Lyres remind me too much of Heaven, so I have to go with a lute. Maybe a harpsichord for here, and hmm...”

Trixie waved her hand at him. “Xylophone!”

“Thank you, urchin. Just not a rainbow-colored one. How's that?”

Chloe nearly died of shock on the spot.

"I've been on earth long enough to see children's toys."

"You know, I'm not going to ask where."

Ella allowed it. “Okay, great, so, you whip out your lute and pluck the strings."

“Ms. Lopez. Please, I’m an artist. I do not _ pluck _ strings.”

Dan had to comment, “God, even your character is obnoxious.”

"You will cease calling me by Dad’s common nomenclature. And _ excuse you_. I _ play _ guitar at least as well as I do the piano. I don’t see why my character can’t.”

“Whatever.”

Ella bounced a little. “Oh, can you bring it sometime? I’d love to hear you. And yeah, you’re a bard so you can play a lot of things. It might be fun to hear you actually play during a game.”

“Certainly.” Lucifer may have perked up just a little, completely missing the fact that she just got him to (kind of) agree to another game. 

* * *

Notes of a stringed instrument filled the room, giving Kira a surge of energy. The Dragonborn reacted, standing up straighter and focusing her attention on the threat. 

One of the two standing men snarled at DF, yanking a dagger from his waist. The weapons strike each other as she catches his blade on hers with an easy move. The steel flashes in the light as he flies at her, his guard too low and sloppy. She falls for his feint and his attack skips across her ribs, slashing her skin and leather open and drawing blood.

She slaps her left hand over the wound with a harsh sound, blood seeping from her injured side and through her fingers. Keeping her dagger at the ready, she chanced a glance backward to see if she had help coming.

The second man still on his feet pulled an innocuous looking red bead from a coat pocket while eyeing the group of Kira, Penny, and Steve. Shouting something in another language - it doesn’t sound friendly - he hauls his arm back to throw the thing hard.

Diving across the space between them, Amrellon attempts to tackle him before he releases it. He doesn’t _ quite _ make it, instead scrabbling at the man's clothing as the heavy bead leaves his fingers. The spell-caster’s eyes widen with realization at what the tiny projectile very likely is. Too late, he yells, "_get down!" _

The glassy bead misses Kira by a figurative mile but strikes the bar with a shattering crack. It bursts into raging magical flames, engulfing the entire bar area in a rush of heat and light. Fire and magical force blow over Kira and Steve, singeing them badly and knocking the wind out of them. Penny is less affected due to her dragon heritage. Her long lips frown at the scorch marks on her scales as if wondering how they even got there, then she marks her target across the way with renewed focus.

The fire on Kira’s armor sputters out as she slaps at it. Coughing hard in the smoke billowing from half of the room, her eyes watering, she reassesses the situation. She won't survive another attack like that, and the fight could still end their mission and lives, here and now if she’s not careful. The Dragonborn and mage seem to be holding their own, so she turns to her companion. Steve appeared to be hurt - blood running down his neck from a head wound and soaking into his beard. He looks like he’s having some trouble focusing, but he’s still upright. Touching her fingers to her face, they come away wet with blood. _ What kind of reckless…? _

Penny charges the bead thrower with a roar and her two-handed bastard sword held aloft. She slashes down and sideways, dropping him with a savage attack. His body crashes to the ground and he stays there, unmoving.

Kira looks around for Lucas, finding him positioned mostly outside the blast zone, but holding his lute limply with a look of surprise or just bewilderment. He has a scratch or two that she can see, but he looked more bruised from the force of the blast than actively bleeding. He’s in better shape than either herself or Steve, so she lets him be for now. There are no targets in range so she lowers her sword slightly, quietly offering a quick prayer to Lathander as she approaches the original combatants.

There’s no response from her God and she never expects one, but it makes her feel better when she prays. The gods hopefully have better things to do than divide their attention to anyone as lowly as herself or Steve, even if they are followers. 

The last man tries to stab the Dragonborn in retaliation but his blade turns and slides off her hide, taking one or two scales with the edge of the blade but doing no real damage to her. She grins down at him with a wide mouth full of dagger-like teeth. Pulling her sword from the body on the floor without breaking eye-contact, she holds it ready again. The flames behind her reflect red and gold off her metallic scales, only adding to her towering, terrifying presence. 

Lucas, seeing her standing over the downed men, snaps out of his indecision, wondering to himself which side of her family the copper dragon heritage came from and how far back it ran.

DF slashes at the last opponent but barely nicks him. She curses in Elvish, hoping for another chance to attack, but the wizard stole it from her.

Amrellon reaches out, throwing his hand past the fallen body to the man still standing, his fingers crackling with fine threads of magical power. He grabbed the man’s wrist and cast his spell with a spoken word and the last thug drops with a cut-off scream - his body smoking rather than bleeding. The discharged magic from the spell normally gives off a clean scent but it was swallowed by crisping, smoking wood in the burning inferno on the other side of the room.

Penny faced the flames licking away from the bar, surging and twisting as they found more fuel. She moved to stomp around the edges to put out or at least stop the spread of fire. Kira dropped her sword on the table (well out of reach of the hostiles), and ran to the front door where their soaking wet cloaks hung on pegs. Snatching them up, she threw one to Steve. Together they smother most of the flames with heavy, wet fabric, dragging soot and throwing up steam to the rafters.

Lucas drags a barrel of ale out from behind the bar and tips it over, making an awful smell but further banking the flames. He curses to himself about 'should be able to just throw it', yelling at the wizard, "can't you do anything?!"

Amrellon snapped, "I make fire, I don't put it out!"

"Well, isn't _ that _ convenient?"

“Not really no!” he looked around for a way he can help and quickly moves to drag wooden chairs and tables away from the flames.

DF stays where she is and keeps her wound covered, breathing shallowly. 

Steve and Kira work with their cloaks, smothering the remaining flames. The owner runs his fingers through his now soot-streaked hair, angry and thinking. He ran to the back room again, returning with a bucket of water from the rain barrel and dumping it on the burning surface of the bar. It smokes and steams, hissing as the last embers go out. He clutches the bucket with whitening knuckles, watching water full of soot and black debris sloshing off the bar and onto the floor.

The front face of the bar had imploded and the damage was centered where the bead had struck. Ragged panels of wood jut, burnt and twisting where they aren't just _ gone. _ The flat top is already beginning to dip with damage and moisture. Shattered glass from bottles and mugs litter the floor in a kaleidoscope, in flashing shards and chunks.

An immense amount of damage had been dealt within seconds. The aftermath is going to take a long time to repair.

Kira went to Lucas and carefully touched his shoulder, squeezing, as he stood, his shock giving way to rising anger. She spoke softly, "hey, most of the building is still standing. You can fix this."

"It won't be the first time I've had to rebuild something. Would've preferred not to do it again."

She tried to be reassuring. "We can find out who is responsible for-" 

"Oh, I know who is responsible." The last ruffian went pale as attention went to him like a magic ray. The blood on his face ran freely from DF's attack, adding to his pallor.

Penny scuffed her clawed feet on the floor, bare but at least as fire-resistant as any pair of sturdy boots. "Fire bad. But my feet are finally dry. Everyone okay? Mo-Kira?"

"I'll be okay, thank you."

DF groaned. "Could use some stitches or something, but I’ll be fine."

"Now that we're all checked in, I need some answers." Lucas points at the man, walking to him. "You!!"

Cowering on his knees, he doesn't try to get up but he looks vaguely confused. "Me?"

"Why did you do this?!"

He stiffens. "We didn't know it’d do that. Why did she attack us anyway? I was jus' defending myself."

Steve came up next to Lucas. "He's lying about the first part."

The thug changed tactics. "Okay, I mean. I guess my buddy knew." He didn't look terribly put out over his _ buddy,_ whose body was now face down and bleeding on the floorboards next to him.

Amrellon went to the guy on the ground, squatting to root through his pockets and pulling out more beads.

Lucas snarled, "oh, fantastic, now he's going to set fire to the rest of us!"

The wizard protested, "I'm making sure the last guy doesn't get any cute ideas! He might try to get more of them from his friend here." He presented spherical red beads, each about the size of a walnut, dangling from his fingers and tied to a sturdy cord. There are four left, with an empty length long enough to hold three more.

Lucas licks his lips. "Why, _ Amrellon_, I had no idea you had anything like that." 

He looked confused then his face went red. "What? No. I don't have any...magic beads like that."

With a completely straight face, Lucas responded, “but you’re a wizard, surely you have _ something_.”

“Oh, uh, I do have a magic wand.”

Lucas smirks.

Kira rubs her forehead. “Guys.”

Amrellon counts to ten and faces the man still alive. "You don't just _ find _ magic items like that lying around! Where did you get it?"

"It was given to us.”

Penny spit out acid that pitted a floorboard.

"We proved worthy of better weapons, better equipment. To use against followers of the light.”

Kira makes eye-contact with Steve, who nods. She asked the wizard, "you know what that is?"

"Yeah, a _ necklace of fireballs_, I'm not powerful enough to cast the spell in them, but I'm in training for it. Each of those beads does as much damage as the one he threw - or more. It's not the most damage you can do with a magic item, but for one of these scruffy-looking...jerks to have something like it, it's really not normal. You have to pitch it to set it off, so these won't hurt us in a bag or pocket. Throw the whole thing at once and it will take this entire place down, not just the bar."

Lucas looks at Amrellon again, amusement in his eyes. "You have a lot of experience with _ fireballs _ do you?"

Amrellon ignores or doesn't notice the innuendo, focusing all his attention on the lone survivor. "Not yet, that’s a third level spell. There’s something else. I think he’s under a magical compulsion."

“Really? To attack…,” Kira and Steve met his stare, “persons of the cloth? Can you break it?”

“It’s too strong for me to do anything about, but it might wear off in a few days too. Steve there has a better chance of breaking it than I do."

Steve shrugs. “I think I need to use my spells today for healing your bartender, and us."

Kira nods to herself. "Well, then. it seems like the undead will have to wait. I'm sure the locals can manage without us until we get to the bottom of this."

Steve gives her a sharp glance. "We're shirking our duties?"

Penny and Maze snicker at the same time. 

"The undead aren't going anywhere - it's been weeks since the church called for spare holy men, the problem might even be over by now - and this man needs our help.” 

“What about our mission?”

“I believe that they attacked us because we’re followers. It’s our fault this inn is half-burned down now.”

The innkeeper waved her off, "don't be ridiculous. It's clearly their fault, and that of the person who laid a compulsion on them. I intend to do something about that."

"You can't just go off. We'll just send a message to our church and let them know it'll be a few more days. This might even be related to our problem."

Lucas' look of incredulity gave way to something softer. "You'd do that? Why?" His countenance flashed hard, "if you intend for me to be in your debt-"

She shrugged indifferently, her armor making the move difficult. "I mean, sure, there are easier ways to try to get free drinks for life at a bar. But, it's what I do. I'm supposed to help people. I'm not asking for payment or, or favors in exchange."

He looked for another reason anyway, doubt pricking at him, "...Lathander compels you then? As much as whoever sent this fellow at you?”

"No, actually, it's the other way around. I chose to follow _ him_. This country or continent or whatever has a million gods. I picked him. He brings out the best parts of myself."

"He called you, did he? Isn't that what holy men and women say?"

"I answered it. The...calling. I didn't have to. It's not the same as following your passion. My goals and Lathander's happen to coincide. I help people. I'm sorry my presence resulted in this."

Lucas looked away in thought, finally noticing that his bartender is bleeding. "You alright?"

"Will be."

Smoke hangs heavy in the air and Lucas stopped worrying about the gods. Someone threw the front door open to let the air clear. DF rooted through the rest of the clothes of the dead men, picking up some coins. She stashes their daggers for later. There are no further magical items found on them. 

Steve, with her permission, touches DF and closes the wound. “We should still stay the night. Anyone else hurt?”

Lucas snorts. “Like I’d allow you to leave tonight. I’ll pack some things for tomorrow. If your church can wait, so can my customers. Not that I'll have many new ones until I get a repair crew here."

The elf pinched her newly healed skin through the hole in her leather. "Someone, at minimum, owes me a new shirt. And a bar."

"Want to get some vengeance, my stabby friend?"

"Absolutely."

* * *

Maze glared daggers at the remaining tiny plastic house on the map. “I’ll tie him up since that’s a _ skill _ I have, and one you apparently need to have to do it right.” 

Chloe crossed her arms. “What makes you think you’re coming with us, Lucas?”

Lucifer gave a half-shrug. “If I have to, DF and I will follow you all the way to wherever you’re going and you’ll never know it. The extensive damage to my inn requires that I find out who laid the compulsion on this poor sap and deal out proper punishment.”

“Alright, but don’t get in the way. I’m in charge here and I’ll be watching you closely.”

“If anything it sounds like I should be watching _ you. _ You’re the primary target, apparently.”

“Fine, keep an eye on my back then.”

“You know I will. I enjoy watching your back.”

Dan wisely kept his mouth shut. Only barely. Maze cut her eyes at Dan. “I guess I’ll keep an eye on the mage then. He looks pretty squishy.”

“Hey now. Okay, yeah, _ he _ is. That magic attack would have killed me outright. That’s just cold, Ella,” he didn’t sound upset, just observant of the fact. 

She rested her chin in her hands. “You weren’t in range.”

“Good thing the bead missed Kira…”

“Good thing you tackled the guy trying to throw it, eh? Pretty brave for a wizard.”

Dan looked at her suspiciously but dropped it. 

Lucifer asked Dan, “I assume you don’t have some other urgent wizard mission that needs your attention? Like leading an army of rats out of the city?”

“That’s more of a druid thing. But yeah, I think you’ll find me useful.”

He glared at his sheet. "How much are repairs going to cost, and can I skin the attackers and sell their hides to raise money for it?"

Ella tented her fingers. "Don't worry. You'll _ probably _find a good amount of treasure at the bad guys' lair."

"So, where is it then?"

"You have to find out. You have one person to get answers from, but even if they had all died, there are other ways to find what you need, but Maze's character could track them back to their hideout eventually."

Maze perked up. "I get to torture someone too? I like this game more and more."

"You already punched him in the face and broke his nose."

"Yeah, and?"

"He's feeling cooperative."

"Party pooper."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't played enough 5th edition to know if I'm mixing up items or rules from 3.5. 
> 
> ((Shrugs))
> 
> Other Reference Links:  
https://roll20.net/compendium/dnd5e/Ability%20Scores#content  
https://www.dndbeyond.com/races/dragonborn  
https://www.dndbeyond.com/classes/rogue  
https://www.dndbeyond.com/classes/paladin  
https://roll20.net/compendium/dnd5e/Classes:Bard#content


	3. Latin for Dummies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party makes a plan then the Luci-crew takes a break for life and snacks. A wild Linda and Charlie appear! Fluff ensues!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The majority of this chapter is a fluffy game break. Enjoy!
> 
> I should wait until tomorrow to post, but my schedule is a bit weird right this second.

DF ties Goon #1 firmly into a chair. She's not gentle.

Steve tends to Kira’s wounds with both magical and mundane means. He utters a short prayer to Lathander, and the magic closes Kira’s wounds to something more managable. It isn’t quite enough for any of them, but it'll do for now.

DF told Lucas that she can do her job, and he should go prep supplies for tomorrow and find everyone some dinner. He sighs dramatically but does as demanded. 

Penny slides into a seat close to the captive, almost breathing down his neck.

Amrellon tries to poke holes in the compulsion spell but he's unsuccessful, as expected. “We could take him the rest of the way to Greyhawk. Most of us know people there that could deal with this in seconds.”

Kira disagreed, “it’s several more days of travel, and not all of us have horses. And there are very likely other clerics, priests or paladins being targeted, maybe even killed.”

Goon #1 smirked. “If we’re lucky.”

“So it is a conspiracy.”

The wizard had to agree with Kira, “we’re better off staying together. We should probably still take the horses rather than leave them here alone.” He nodded at the goon, “we just need a direction to travel.”

Lucas returned with wrapped up provisions and a few skins of wine. “This place will likely get robbed while I’m gone, so we might as well pack or eat all the good supplies.”

DF looked coldly into the eyes of the man she tied up. Addressing Lucas, “don’t sweat it, boss, I’m good at setting traps. One person tries to break into our home, no one else will when they see the results.” She cocked her head at their captive. “What’s your name?”

He looks from one face to another, perhaps reconsidering his life choices. 

Penny growled and let a little acid drip from the corner of her mouth. 

It was enough of a display to overcome the compulsion, at least for now. “_ Okay, _ I’m Raff. I’ve been paid to clear out anyone who follows a holy God. Anyone we think we can tackle, anyway.”

The Rogue played with her dagger. “You thought you could take them? Us?”

“That’s what we were debating over when you slugged me. We were going to wait until the lighties were separate again to bring them down.”

“Lighties?”

“You’ll figure it out.”

“Why though?”

“Who knows. I have a job and I got paid well for it.”

Lucas went to DF, drinking straight from a bottle of wine as he moved. “You should have chosen a different profession. I’m sure your friends wish you had.”

He shrugs. “_ Sellsword _ paid pretty well up until now. They’re not my friends. Wanna sob story about a wife and sick kid? I’m just looking out for me, and the boss pays good for results.”

“That’s all your interested in, is it? Not too worried about the afterlife, taking out followers of good-aligned deities? I’ve yet to be convinced there are any, but Kira here didn’t just sit back and let the place burn. Unlike her, you may eventually be facing flames of another sort.”

Raff looked up at him, his eyes glazing over again, certain in his convictions. “I’ve got connections. I’ll be just fine.”

“Post-_ death _ connections? You sound very sure of that.”

The captive sat up straighter. “I knew what I was getting into.”

Lucas moved to kick over the chair, but Amrellon stopped him with a hand on his chest. “Hang on, he’s under the compulsion again, he doesn’t know what he’s saying now.”

“What good is he then?”

Turning a chair around backward, Kira takes a seat, eye to eye with Raff. “Your boss might reward you if you come back with me.”

Lucas stiffens. Steve watches her. 

Raff responds, “yeah? He wants proof of the dead, not hostages. Although…”

“What?”

He shook his head. “Nothing. If I come back with your holy symbols I would still be paid. He can tell if you try to trick him by buying them at a market. Someone tried it, and they suffered for it.”

Kira leaned in, focusing on the first part. “Are you implying he has hostages? Who is he?”

He froze again and shut his mouth, glaring. “You can’t make me betray my lord!”

She rubbed her face tiredly, smearing black on her chin. “He’s going to just keep shutting down. I think that’s as much as we can get out of him for now. We can talk about a plan in the morning after we all get some rest.”

Lucas closes in on him, heedless of her advice. “Raff. What is it you want out of your miserable life? Gold? Magical enhancement? A place to call your own?”

He sneered, “I could use a sodden, half-burned down building. Have you got one?”

Growling, “just because I can’t offer you anything now doesn’t mean I can’t in the future. Your very soul may be at stake.”

Raff spit in his face.

He froze, stunned for several seconds, then composed himself, reaching for a handkerchief in his leather jacket. “Well, that didn’t work. I guess _ I’m _not charming enough. I could try bashing him over the head with my lute, but I feel like that would be a waste.”

Reaching out, Kira squeezes his arm sympathetically. “I’d like to hear you play sometime when you aren’t just doing magic. We’ll help you clean up tonight. We probably can’t get anything useful out of this guy right now, but maybe in the morning we’ll have a plan.”

Steve’s face pinched. “You mean _ other _ than marching him to town and turning him over to the law?”

“There are more lives at stake. I don’t think we have time for that.”

“I assume you don’t mean hanging him now?” he sounded both curious and angry over his partner suggesting what he thought she was suggesting. “We have a system.”

Even Raff appeared to be a little worried. “You can’t do that. You’re _ lighties _. You don’t do that.”

The paladin tilted her head at him. “It’s true you didn’t kill anyone here, but you did try to. We’ll decide your fate in the morning.”

* * *

Ella giggled internally with barely restrained glee. She coughed and said, “we can take a short break now if you want - you guys want a drink or snack? Trixie, are you having fun?”

“I got a bad guy! We’re going after more bad guys right?”

“Oh yeah, you guys have more adventuring to do!"

Chloe rose from her seat, giving Lucifer’s shoulder a gentle squeeze. He smiled and it might have been a little less brittle than before. “How about you? Having fun?”

He considered it. “It’s not what I expected.”

Ella stood to make a trip to the kitchen, pausing to hover. “How so?”

“I thought there’d be more...fighting by now?”

“The best games have a lot more role-playing than fighting. Once you get higher level, and if you want to keep playing, the fights can last the entire session or even longer.”

He picked up a die at random and rolled it around between his fingers. “Sounds...tedious."

“Working working to defeat a big bad guy is pretty rewarding. And after a few handfuls of games, Dan can cast spells like invisible walls, lightning bolts, protection circles, all kinds of things. Lucas will charm a whole room of people, and Chloe will do massive damage attacks from horseback, and Steve can resurrect party members. You’ve played some video games like that, this just adds more character building and you get to add personal touches as you go."

“Your game rather seems like the long way ‘round.”

“You do want to know who the bad guy is, don’t you?”

“Hmmmph. I might just look it up online. The internet has been an ideal invention.”

Ella grinned even wider. “You can’t find out that way!”

Even Chloe looked curious. Dan sat up with a knowing smirk. Amenadiel had gone rooting around in the fridge for a beer for himself and juice for Trixie.

“I made him up myself! The only way you get to find out who and what they are is if you keep playing. And most importantly, their _ motivation. _”

Lucifer had that ‘I’m somewhat excited by the prospect but I don’t want anyone to know’ face. “I see. I suppose I wouldn't be doing my duty as a participant if I didn't see this through."

Which Ella saw through right away. “I knew you’d be hooked.”

He scoffed mildly, but he had to admit he loved a good story. He could work the ending out of one of the others if he didn’t stay with the game, but Chloe seemed to be enjoying herself too - funneling aspects of her job into her character. But then she’d always been a workaholic.

Ella had not given them instructions on what to do with their characters - other than ‘have fun’ and to try to follow whatever alignment they’d chosen, many of which were inherent to the class they picked anyway. Chloe’s paladin had to be ‘lawful’ and of course Maze wanted ‘chaotic’. Lucifer was _ trying _ not to just be himself, but it was harder than he thought it would be. 

He looked over to Dan, nose-deep in one of the glossy-paged books, looking up something or other. Leaning a little, it looked like he was reading descriptions for simple Wizard spells. “Didn’t you say you’ve done this before?”

“Hmm? Not the new one. Stuff changes a lot over the years, and it’s been a while - since before Trixie, at least. If Ella runs any more of these, I’ll need to memorize at least some of this.”

“I was blamed for this too, you know.”

“Sorry?”

“Haven’t you heard? Dungeons and Dragons is all my fault. Along with rock n’ roll.”

Chloe snorted. “It’s been a long time since there was any hysteria around the game, Luce.”

Her ex finally glanced up from the book. “Well, thanks? I guess? Sounds like there are some advantages to pretending to be the Devil.”

He looked insulted. As usual. “At least your spawn never doubted me.”

“And I assume Chloe is putting up with it for some reason, but at least she’s happy you’re back.”

“Oh?”

Dan gave him a look. “If she wasn’t - and if I thought I could say anything to change her mind - I wouldn’t try to put up with you. I still don’t know what I did in my previous life to deserve this, but she likes working with you and Trixie adores you. So I can either be mostly okay that I’m stuck with you in our lives or I can set everything on fire again like I did before you left.”

Lucifer was quiet for a moment and Dan flipped a page. “I suppose I should be trying at least as hard as you. It hasn’t been easy for me either.”

That earned an eye-roll. “Sure, Being an eccentric millionaire must be really hard for you.”

“Oh, that part _ is _ easy. It did take a few millennia to build my fortune, between here and Hell. It’s the going back to Hell part I’m not looking forward to.”

“Hmmm.”

Chloe’s head jerked up. “What was that?”

“Nothing to worry about anytime soon, Detective. You know, Daniel, I’ve known a few _ wizards _ in my day.”

He barely even looked up. “Oh? Like Houdini?”

This would not do. “Merlin was real. Talented for a human.” Chloe was still giving him a squinty-eyed look that said she was still thinking about what he let slip. Why did he have to go and fall for a smart woman?

Absently, Dan asked, “Morgana too?”

“In a sense. Magic hasn’t been prevalent in this world in quite a long time. It still exists.”

Chloe, to Dan’s vague annoyance, looked interested. “You’re kidding, right?”

“I do not generally _ kid_.”

Trixie wiggled in her seat. “Can you do magic, Lucifer?”

“I can, urchin. So can Mazikeen, but she relies more on practical spells - ones that require rituals. Most of my abilities are inherent - gifts from my Father or learned over time.”

Her dad cut an eye at him. “So now you’re the Devil _ and _a wizard?”

He grinned at Trixie. “Would you like to see something, child?”

Dan put his book down and laced his fingers over it. “Okay, you can do a trick, but it better not involve anything inappropriate.”

Lucifer gave him a flat look in return, speaking volumes about what he thought of Dan’s _ permission _. Maze got a gleam in her eye. She started to speak, but Lucifer held up a finger. “Something simple.”

He closed his fingers together and a feather the length of his hand appeared between his thumb and forefinger. It seemed to be glowing slightly. Maze grumbled and Trixie clapped. 

He held it up, blew on it very softly and it floated over to her unerringly. She cupped it in her hands reverently, eyes shining. Chloe had a hand over her mouth, hiding a smile. Trixie stroked it with her fingers. “Does it do anything?”

“Not really. It fell out of my wings sometime recently. The Divinity won’t last much longer on such a small feather. The bigger ones have more power. Humans can’t actually _ do _ much with them unless you’re secretly a witch.”

Her dad bit his tongue, then asked, “are you saying you _ molt?” _

Chloe pictured his penthouse covered in feathers. She snickered. 

Lucifer gave them all a dark look. “I do not molt.” He crossed his arms. “Often.”

Dan eyed him. “So, that’s it?” he gave an extra glance over Lucifer’s bare forearms, looking for a...feather shooter or something. He admitted to himself the trick looked impressive for the spontaneity of it. 

Lucifer got a cross look on his face and started to respond, but a knock at the door preceded Linda and baby Charlie. "Hi, guys!" She came in carrying reusable grocery bags and had the baby strapped to her chest in a contraption that made Lucifer pause. 

“What on earth is that?”

“I brought some cookies,” she held up one of the bags, “I still can’t bake to save my life, but luckily the store still carries Oreos.”

“No, _ that,_” he clarified, pointing at Charlie.

“What? The carrier? Are you going to make some sort of torture device comment?”

“...not now.”

“You want to try it?”

“Also no.”

Chloe held out her arms with grabby hands. Linda unstrapped him and handed him over with a grin. Charlie was dressed in a blue onesie that said ‘Little Angel” on the front and had printed wings on the back. Chloe and Ella made noises over him while Lucifer escaped to the kitchen side of the room and found a bottle of whiskey he kept stashed at Chloe’s. Maze pretended she didn’t want to cuddle the baby too. 

Amenadiel came back to the table to coo over Charlie like he hadn’t just seen him a few hours ago. Linda pulled him down for a quick kiss. “How’s my favorite angel?”

“Pretty good, actually. How’s my favorite human?”

Dan glanced up from his phone and rubbed his face. “You too?”

Ella stole Charlie from Chloe, bouncing him lightly, “he’s gotten so big!” 

He softened, watching the baby. “I remember when Trixie was that size. You’re going to be chasing him all over the place soon.”

“I know. I bubble wrapped the ceiling fan just in case. Maze helped.”

“You did what now?”

Chloe bit her lip, but added in a sing-song totally fake voice, “Yeah, just in case he has wings. Because, uhm. Half-angel. You know. Ha ha.” She whispered to Linda, “you don’t know yet right?”

Linda whispered back, “well, actually-”

“Right. My turn. I need a baby fix.” Dan gently took Charlie from Ella, holding him up, “Hey tiny angel. I’m sorry everyone you’re going to grow up with is insane. But they do love you.” He stood and grabbed a kitchen towel off the counter for baby drool, “don’t worry, I’ll be your sane uncle.” to Linda, he said, “I know I said it before, but thank you for naming him after Charlotte. She would have loved him too.”

Amenadiel bit back a ‘she does’, looking sadly at the two humans who couldn’t know. Instead, he just said, “I hope he takes after her in some way. He’s special, just like she was.”

Lucifer drained his tumbler of whiskey. “Well, not _ just _-”

“Luci.”

He huffed. “...I suppose he_ is _ special. And I _ guess _ Daniel can be an uncle too.”

“Of course he can. We’re all family here.”

Dan kissed Charlie’s forehead where his black curls had begun to grow with a vengeance. “That’s right, you’re stuck with me. Hey, call me if you want me to take him on my next weekend with Trixie, okay?”

Linda came over to them. She hesitated just a beat, “yeah, we will.”

“...Is that okay?”

“It’s just that Charlie can be a handful. I'm told he's really active for his age. For just about any age, actually. I'm not super comfortable leaving him with _ anyone_, it's not you."

“I can handle kids, I grew up in a big family. I bet Trixie would love it too, right?”

“Yeah!”

“See?” He juggled Charlie to his hip, bouncing him on his way to the kitchen. Lucifer refilled his glass and swept past, giving them space. “Hey, don’t you want to get in on some of this baby action?”

“I’m already holding something,” he gestured by holding up his glass and fifth of whiskey.

Ella followed Dan, both as an excuse to make faces at the baby some more and to get something to drink too. She booped his tiny nose then bent to look in the fridge. Dan pointed at something over her shoulder on the shelf. Charlie squirmed, made a fussy noise and his wings popped out of his back with barely a flutter.

Fortunately, neither of them noticed. 

Linda waved her arms frantically at Amenadiel, pointing to the brightly colored, soft grey, golden and hummingbird-green feather wings sticking out of Charlie's back and a hair's breadth from Dan's arm. They were tiny - maybe each the size of her hands, and they stretched independently as he yawned lazily. They stuck out like a sore thumb. Or two.

Chloe barely suppressed a smile that tried to take over her entire face, noticing that the wings behaved just like Lucifers, passing through his clothing without interacting with it.

Amenadiel did a double-take, winced and tried to tip-toe back to Dan, hands out and making very soft noises to get Charlie's attention.

Without looking up, Ella passed a beer to Dan, who shifted baby Charlie on his hip. He took the beer with one hand and started to turn away. There was no way he wouldn’t see the wings if he so much as glanced at the baby.

Amenadiel whisper-shouted, “_alis auferetur!” _ Which drew the attention of everyone in earshot. Charlie's wings vanished and Amenadiel sighed with relief, hand on his chest. Dan and Ella were still looking at him, so he added lamely, “It’s a...uhm, type of beer, is there any in the fridge?”

Ella responded, “A beer name in Latin? Dude, I need to try that. I don’t see any though. Did you finish your other one already?”

“...It’s for Chloe.”

“Is that like a private brew? I didn’t think you liked beer, Decker.”

Chloe dropped her hands from her face. “Yeah, I picked up a taste for it. Recently. Good stuff.”

“I don’t really know Latin, do the words mean something?”

Lucifer nodded, “They do, in fact-”

Amenadiel cut him off, “it means, uh. _Flight_.”

“Not even the most bastardized version-”

“It’s a _ beer, _ Luci, it doesn’t have to _ mean _ anything.”

Dan rolled his eyes and decided he didn’t want to know. 

Lucifer didn’t quite let it drop. “You’ve successfully trained your child already? What else does he know?”

Dan one-handedly uncapped his beer on the counter churchkey. He assumed it had been installed by Maze at some point and Chloe never got rid of it. He wasn't wrong. Ella grabbed one of the packages of Oreos and brought them back with her to the table. Dan commented, “none for you yet, Charlie. I promise you these are awesome though.’

Amenadiel sat down close to his brother, “Just a few things in Latin. He understands a few words of the angelic tongue as well. If you’re wondering, I don’t believe he will have your ability to speak all languages, but it’s hard to tell at this point what or if he’ll have any powers.”

“Well, you’re going to have a difficult time finding a sitter if you can’t keep those things under control.”

Chloe bent in, “We’re going to have to tell _ them _ eventually. We can’t keep them out of Charlie’s life. Dan and Ella will go insane if they can’t ever babysit. Can you, uhm... tie the wings down or something?”

Lucifer looked at her, insulted. 

“I’ll take that as a ‘no’ then.” She peeked up to make sure nothing celestial was happening again. Charlie had pressed his little head on Dan’s shoulder and looked like he was falling asleep. “Did you bring a play crib? I don’t have Trixie’s old one anymore.”

Linda nodded, “yup! My boy-toy-angel can help me unload the car and then you guys can get back to your game.” Amenadiel gave her a long-suffering look but got up to do just that.

“You want to play too?”

“Nah, I just want to watch. I don’t get to observe Amenadiel or Lucifer doing new things very often, and I think it’ll be fun when I publish my book someday - _ Raising Angels.” _

Chloe’s mouth fell open a bit.

“I’m _ kidding. _ No one would buy it anyway and I don’t want to risk losing my license again. So, where are you guys at?”

“Well... Ella helped me make a Paladin.”

Linda arched an eyebrow at the name on the sheet and smiled. “Lightbringer? Hmmm. I wonder where that came from. Is this whole thing anything like tribe night?”

“You know, a little. Less drinking though, so far. Are you going to take notes on us?”

“Maaaaaybe. Just pretend I’m not here. Which...uhm…thing on the table is you?”

Chloe picked up her shoe token, “you know, the one from the game I had went missing and I had to buy a new one. Did you know that the company _ retired _ the shoe? Can you believe it?”

“Oh, it did, huh? Hmm. Interesting.”

“What is?”

“Oh, nothing. What are the houses?”

“They’re bad guys. The one on the mat is still alive and being questioned and the other two are dead. Trixie got one and Dan got the other.”

Dan came back, placing his beer on a coaster. He still held Charlie who had completely passed out against his chest. “Hey,” he said quietly, “I’m gonna keep your baby.”

Ella sat down at her place and rolled her eyes. “Not unless I steal him first.”

The baby’s father returned through the front door loaded down with pastel bags and a folding play crib under one arm. “Linda? Honey?”

“Oh! Right!” she jumped up to help, taking the crib and setting it up in Trixie’s room. “I’m going to guess it might get loud in here? If he gets too fussy, I’ll head back home early.”

A collection of puffy bags quickly occupied the island. Amenadiel gestured to Dan, “want to put him down? He usually sleeps pretty solidly.”

“Sure. It’s been a while but I think I got this.” Dan stuck his tongue out at Chloe. “I guess you have to wait until he’s up again.”

Chloe saw Lucifer standing apart and looking at the bags like they might jump up and bite him. She got up again and touched his arm lightly. “Hey.”

He tensed but didn’t move away. He wasn’t looking at her either though. “Your spawn was much like that?”

“Very much. You could come help me sit him sometime if you want. Trixie loves pretending he can understand her. The four of us could spend an afternoon together?”

“He smells funny.”

She moved her hand gently to his face and he finally looked away from Trixie’s door to her. She smiled softly. “He’ll get older. Soon he’ll be walking. He won’t be that little forever.”

“Have you ever seen an angel baby before? I haven’t.”

“Well… so far he’s developed almost just like Trixie did. He’s not as gassy and he might be a little larger than she was at that age. Charlie sleeps better too, like he knows for sure he’s somewhere safe.”

“It’s not...normal?”

“Human babies have terrible instincts. They put anything they can get their grabby hands on in their mouths and they roll off beds and everything else. They aren’t really processing the world for a few more months; they can come to understand what’s safe and what isn’t, but it’s not really about _ knowing _.”

“So they’re basically useless at first?”

She laughed in spite of herself, and Lucifer relaxed minutely. She rubbed her thumb over his cheek and then kissed where she’d just caressed, her lips pressed into his soft scruff and she let it linger as long as she dared. “That okay?”

He looked at her like she was the most amazing thing in the world. Then he shut off again. But the light was there for just a moment. “Yes. I enjoy your touch, Detective.”

She held his hand, squeezing his fingers and standing close enough to catch the smell of his cologne without seeming creepy about it. She hoped. “Okay. Good. Touch me too, any time you want, okay?”

He nodded - too sharply. It was still progress and she would take it. She hated how skittish he still was, but being in Hell, especially after he thought he would never go back, must have been worse than she could imagine. She already missed the response he might have given a year ago - before he left - some infuriating innuendo about touching _ any time _ and work environments.

He was unwilling to help her imagine what Hell was like. 

Lucifer held her gaze a moment longer, then turned and announced he was stepping out for a smoke. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Life notes: hopefully *final* surgery on Monday. Chapter 4 should go up later this week when I'm feeling better and 5 and 6 the following week.
> 
> Had a cancer scare. So that was fun. Nothing serious but I'm still losing a few bits. Wish me luck.


	4. Road Trip

Just before the break of dawn, Kira ‘let’ Raff get up for a bathroom break. He predictably attacked, landing a solid punch. She faked falling to the floor unconscious. He grabbed Kira’s holy symbol from her neck and took off with it right when DF appeared and shouted an alarm. 

The elf convinced them that the hooligan wouldn’t stop to try to finish Kira off as long as someone ran out from the back room at the right moment. She turned out to be right.

Raff flew at the door with the wild-eyed stare and victorious cry of a true fanatic, sure of his successful escape. 

DF took satisfaction in the fact Raff slammed into the doorframe on his way out, his limbs still somewhat uncooperative from where she secured them too tightly for comfort sometime past midnight when she last checked on him. The muscle stiffness would be atrocious. If he noticed her smirk, it didn't stop him. 

He didn’t take a horse - even if he’d been smart enough to think of it, the fact that Penny was very visibly tending to the horses in the pre-dawn rising light kept him from trying his luck any further. Instead, he just booked it out on foot as fast as his stumbling steps allowed. Even an unarmed fanatic would think twice before tackling a fully armed Dragonborn.

Penelope came in when his mucking footfalls vanished from sight and hearing. DF strolled out on the narrow porch and nodded to herself, smiling wolfishly. 

The deep mud from several days of rain would make for very clear tracks. There was no need to give immediate chase. The delay of an hour or so would give their quarry enough time to feel safe while fleeing and become careless.

The morning was dewy with heavy mist and lingering wetness, but at least it wasn’t raining cats and dogs anymore. Lucas assisted Steve by dragging the two bodies off the porch where they had been outside all night and got them somewhere they could bury them off the road and out of the way. Burning them was out of the question, though Lucas was tempted to waste a bead on trying it.

DF nodded in satisfaction as she set the last of her traps at the front door after everyone had packed up. The windows had broken glass and caltrops just inside on the floor, and the chimney was completely walled off at the bottom with rocks. Anyone who could fit to get down wouldn’t have the strength to remove them. The walls were mostly plaster but usually people didn’t think to try going through that.

With luck, the whole area was still wet enough that it wouldn’t burn down from arson if any thieves got so frustrated by the traps that they decided to try to raze it instead of burgling it.

Lucas pulled the hanging sign off the hook and set it just inside the door before locking up. He gave the threshold a last look. “Be good, I’ll be back to fix you up.”

Kira settled her armor, and patted him on the back with a gauntleted hand. “You will. I’ll see to it.”

Steve said a short epitaph over the buried bodies. No one thought to ask their names, but he couldn't shake the idea they might have been under magical duress and perhaps their actions hadn't been entirely their own. If he were a more experienced cleric he would talk to their souls directly.

Were he that, though, he probably wouldn't even be here.

They set out without any backward looks, walking the horses so they wouldn't get stuck in the mud with the added weight of riders. 

The tracks are incredibly easy to follow, with no other traffic on this road and the rain having taken care of any previous footprints.

Hours passed before there was any deviation in the trail. It had become monotonous in a short time and Penny asked for a song.

Lucas agreed and began singing _ What do You do With a Drunken Sailor _ and dredged up every variation he could think of for the refrain until Amrellon threatened to throw one of the magic beads at him.

Nearly all of them went right past the place the tracks turned off the trail while they were chattering, until Penny, of all of them, paid a little more attention to their surroundings and pointed it out. The tracks left the main, muddy road just past a short bridge over a swollen river. For a short period of time, they were able to follow clumps of mud and dirt and it seemed that their quarry had truly gone cross-country.

Raff had found another, drier trail, and went south. The new trail turned out to be more of a deer track, leaving them to walk single-file. DF went ahead to keep an eye out and Penny took up the rear position with the horses. Like the main, muddy trail they spent all morning slogging against, this track only had two directions to go, and they already knew which way Raff had gone.

The party halted in a flat meadow while DF went ahead to see how much further the trail they were following ran, if she could. Kira pointed out they didn’t know if it would be days or hours and they should conserve their energy. Lucas observed that the stuff the ruffians were carrying couldn’t have sustained them for long, and their master clearly expected them to return in a short time with proof of their grisly deeds. Additionally, their captive didn't stop to loot supplies either - at the inn or elsewhere.

The rest of the party waited, breaking out a quick lunch, and continuing to debate the merits of waiting to see how far away they were actually going.

DF reappeared as if from the shadows themselves, grabbed a wineskin from Lucas and took a long drink. "I think we're getting close. The guy is moving slower now and his prints are even less 'sneaky.' Despite the fact the whole forest can probably hear Kira and Steve moving in armor, I think we are still far enough behind not to be observed." She wiped her chin and looked down at Amrellon with an observation. “You have a snake in your pants.”

Kira and everyone else turn to look. 

He did, in fact, have a snake in his pants. Actually, his robes, but the placement was unintentional, as well as awkward. “Yeah, I almost forgot about her.” He fondly held up a three-foot-long black and tan snake using both hands, who was definitely looking back at them with judgemental eyes. “She’s my wizard’s familiar.”

DF bounced down on her heels. “Can I pet her?”

“Sure.”

The snake flicked her tongue out, tasting and smelling DF's palm. She pushed her head up for tiny scratches, which she got.

Lucas flared his nostrils. “Honestly, what can a _ snake _ do?”

“Well, not much now. But she can deliver a spell for me and I can communicate with her as long as she’s sort of close by.”

“A little boring, isn’t it?”

“Nah, snakes are underappreciated. They have a great sense of smell too. It’s not like I can have anything like a wolf yet anyway."

Kira squinted at it. “Does she bite?”

“Not unless I ask her to. She’s not venomous and she wouldn’t really do any damage with a bite.” He handed her over to DF, who cradled her gently in the palms of her cupped hands. 

Kira leaned in close and would have sworn that the damn thing was purring. “She looks friendly, I guess. Does she have a name?”

“Cam.”

DF sat up suddenly. “Hey, take Cam back.”

“Yeah, what’s up?” he did, letting her coil back into a pocket. She snatched a tiny piece of smoked meat from his meal as she went.

“There’s something out there.”

“Like a-”

“_Shhhhhhh. _Everyone get up. Now.” They followed her orders without further questions, scrambling to get up to their feet.

A howl made by nothing natural resonated across the open air of the meadow. It sounded like a pair of throats until the source charged and revealed the assumption to be technically true.

Kira had just gotten to standing when a dark-furred beast burst from the nearby trees, charging for her with simmering eyes; four of them. Undulating figures with too many legs flow close behind it, hissing. She takes a step forward to put herself squarely between the things from the woods and her companions.

DF moved to one side of Kira, crouching in the tall grass to reduce her profile. She draws a dragger and tenses, ready to spring.

From behind them, magic bolts fly from Amrellon, scoring hits on the four-legged creature. It doesn't change direction but the thing _ might _ have missed a step as the magic energy struck home.

It's a real monster - two-headed and doglike in general shape but barely a shadow of any domesticated canine. It runs fast and with heads down, moving with single-minded purpose, drool streaming from both mouths and white teeth bared.

With her height, Penny is able to make out that the creatures behind it are thick-legged spiders almost as large as the first monster, moving in a herd. She draws her crossbow and takes a potshot at one of the spiders. It staggers sideways but keeps coming behind the others, the bolt sticking out of its back, ichor beginning to well up around the wound.

Lucas sees Steve bracing up next to Kira and decides to focus on the spiders. He spoke, yelling while pointing at one of the wolf spiders close behind the first beast, “_ Serve me!” _

The spider he singled out abruptly slows down to a normal, if fast, pace. It changes direction toward Lucas and appears to be suddenly non-hostile - it's not like the things have facial expressions, but the spider's body language alters significantly. If spiders could trot, it's...trotting toward him. Lucas waved his arms at his party members to get their attention, “don’t attack that one, it’s under my control now.”

Any relief they felt waned when five spiders pass by their charmed companion and keep moving forward at a collective, shuffling pace. Their carapaces and legs rub each other, making sounds akin to nails dragging down a chalkboard. The mass of legs and chittering bodies swarm in a river of insectoid vehemence 

The dog-beast covers the rest of the distance between it and them in a heartbeat, leaping to attack Kira and snapping both sets of jaws.

DF explodes from the grass at its flank, burying her dagger into its side, between ribs. The wounds from both magic and steel start to take their toll on it, infuriating it. The beast howls and lunges, biting at Kira and sinking two rows of teeth and fangs into her leg, getting into an unarmored spot.

She grunts and attacks at the same time, swinging her longsword and dragging it along its chest for a devastating wound. Steve slams the side of one of the heads with his mace, and it falls limp, throwing the whole body off balance. 

Penny drops her empty crossbow, pulls her sword and brings it down on the first spider that closes in on her, cleaving it into halves straight down the middle. Someone gave her a quick cheer and turned back to the fight. 

Lucas got a crossbow bolt into the spider that Penny shot first and dropped it. The two remaining spiders both try to bite Penny, but only one attack succeeds. She shakes off the poison bite of the one that got through, taking only a minor wound. 

The rogue finishes off the dog-beast with a final, decisive strike to the chest, felling it and turning to find a new target, but Steve slew one of the spiders attacking Penny and Kira got the other.

They stand, panting and wary for several seconds until they're sure the only thing left is Lucas' charmed wolf spider. DF strode up to it, gripping her dagger decisively. The spider watched her with all eight eyes, oblivious. Penny watched her approach and made a pained noise at odds with the gore coating her sword. DF looked back at the Dragonborn, confusion on her face. “What’s wrong?”

Penny bit her tongue. “It doesn’t seem right.”

"You want to spare it?"

She protested, "it's not hurting anyone _ now_. How long does the spell last?"

Lucas, appearing at least as puzzled as DF, replied, "a day. As long as no one attacks it, the spell won't break. But...it's a _ monster_."

"It’s just a big spider. We could send it with DF for extra protection."

The rogue looked askance at the eight-legged thing. The spider shuffled in place. "Will it obey me?"

Lucas concentrated, directing it, "_protect her." _

The wolf spider instantly crouched, hopping in a half-circle defensively and on guard. DF raised an amused eyebrow. "Okay then, for a day we have a pet spider, apparently. It's not like just one of these things is a threat to any of us." She reached down to scratch it on the equivalent of a neck. It hummed and tilted to lean up into her hand. It had expansive tufts of soft, fine fur that both gave it the wolf part of the name and made it just a little less intimidating. Sort of. When it wasn't trying to murder you.

Steve had Kira sit so he could examine her injuries. "Did the beast poison you?"

"It's not that bad. I have a healing potion in my bag, over on the packhorse."

Behind Penny, the packhorse and Kira's Paladin mount seemed to be the only ones left. The other horses had bolted in fear when everyone was distracted. Kira groaned. "Next time we stop I guess we better tie them down if they come back. The rest _ might _ just wander back to the inn on their own."

Lucas retrieved her potion and handed it to her, looking her over carefully. "Are you sure you're not badly hurt? You seem to be bleeding quite a bit.”

Steve pulled back her torn leather on her leg, revealing a seeping wound. It was a fairly deep gash with punctures from the bite. He hissed. "Hurry up and drink that. I'll do my healing thing. Anyone else hurt? Penny?"

"Not much. I’m okay.”

Kira uncorked the potion and swallowed it. Between that and a healing spell from Steve, she was feeling almost as good as new. The magic did its job as it had many times before, knitting the edges of the angry gash to leave a pink line of healthy skin. Lucas thought she still looked a bit pale though.

She picked forlornly at her torn leather pants until Amrellon threw a magic cantrip spell on it to mend it. 

DF made an impatient sound. "Are you done playing tailor? Can we get moving again?" She cocked her head at the slain beasts. "Is giant wolf spider venom worth harvesting?"

The wizard answered, "yeah, actually, run your dagger or anything else with an edge through it, under the fangs, and your next attack might poison your enemy - arrows too."

"Neat. I'm naming the living one Peter."

The Dragonborn fighter brightened, “that’s a good name. We can keep it back at the _ Double Decker._”

Lucifer looked at Trixie incredulously. “You can’t keep a spider the size of a Golden Retriever at my inn."

Trixie stuck her tongue out at him, “I can for a _ day_!”

“Lucas doesn’t have that many spells, child. He could renew it every day, but I suspect it would put off patrons.”

“Why? He’s adorable!”

Chloe crossed her arms on the table, sensing something else going on. “Not everyone thinks spiders are adorable.” She looked at Ella for help. The game master addressed Trixie, “I mean, it doesn't have a lot of hit points. It’s probably going to get killed along the way. Are you going to be okay with that?”

She pressed her lips together. “You can keep him from getting killed! Make him magic or something.”

* * *

Her mom spoke softly, “honey, that’s not how this game works. I thought you might have more of a problem with the two-headed dog when it rushed out, honestly.”

Ella studied the little girl. “It’s no fun if there’s not a chance of failure. Just like with Monopoly, not everyone can just win the game. All the characters here can ‘win’ in the long run, but they’re going to get hurt or lose stuff along the way - just like in books or movies. Once in a while, a character might even die permanently and the player will have to make a brand new one. We talked about all this before we started tonight and you seemed okay then. Do you want to keep playing? You can totally stop if you want.”

The girl crossed her arms defiantly. “The dog was scary. Spiders aren’t scary.”

Dan caught Chloe’s eye. “Alright, they aren’t scary. What’s this about, Monkey? Do you want a real pet?”

Trixie sighed. 

Chloe got up and hugged Trixie. “Hey, baby, we can’t have big pets here in the apartment. It’s against the rules. But, we could go maybe look at some hermit crabs or-”

She perked up right away. “A tarantula??”

Her mom froze. Dan tried really really hard not to laugh. He really did. Chloe cleared her throat. “I guess… we could do that. If it stays in its cage. And you’ll be the one feeding it and cleaning up. When did you decide you liked spiders?”

Trixie pointed at Maze, “Maze told me spiders are really useful, and they eat bad bugs and that they’re good bugs, and that tarantulas can be affectionate!”

“I, Uh.”

Dan sobered when he realized the thing would likely have to travel with Trixie on his weekends with her. He made a note to get a tiny locking mechanism. Just in case. “Really, Maze?”

She smiled, and it seemed genuine. “Oh yeah, spiders were one of my favorites in Hell. There were even ones like the book mentioned - spiders as big as dogs.” She had her phone up and turned it around to show them the illustration she found. Lucifer cocked his head. “That’s actually pretty accurate, wrong color though. Come to think of it, didn’t you have one a few hundred years ago named _ Nagereg__?” _

“‘Had’ is relative, but we liked each other. She made beautiful webs, remember? They were sometimes the size of -” she glanced around, considering, “A football field. She used to catch the most amazing things.”

“That’s right. And she started to leave you messages in _ Lilim_, I believe. I hope she’s doing alright without you.”

Dan caught up mentally. “_Charlotte’s Web_? That was...not a…giant hell spider.”

Trixie giggled. Chloe was trying to picture Lucifer and Maze playing catch with a huge spider in Hell and it...wasn’t a stretch.

Maze crossed her arms and winked at Trixie. “You never know. Sometimes things leak through from Heaven and Hell back to earth. Maybe Charlotte the spider was inspired by _ Nagereg _somehow. Ella, I believe you now have a moral imperative to help keep Peter alive.”

Trixie gave Ella her best _ chocolate cake _ face. 

Ella rolled her eyes and looked up at the ceiling then back at Trixie. “I’ll make a deal with you. I’ll take you myself to go find a good tarantula since your mom and dad seem to not want to do that, but you have to be a good player here at the table.” Chloe nodded vigorously. Dan twitched. Ella continued, “I had one myself as a kid and he was really sweet. But if Peter dies, you have to be able to deal with it. okay? No freaking out. I’m not going to break or change any rules for him - Lucifer can drop the charm spell and let Peter go off into the woods, or you guys can keep him with the party and _ hope _ nothing bad happens to him.”

“Okay! I’m not a little kid anymore. I can do it. I want to keep him.”

“BUT, and I mean it, if you get really out of sorts over Peter, I won’t take you. Got it?”

Chloe added, “she’s right. If you get bent out of shape over Ella running the game the way it’s supposed to be played, we won’t get you a spider or anything else at all, and then you won’t be able to name it...uh.”

Lucifer grinned, “_Nagereg_?”

Trixie bounced in her seat, put her hands on the table and sat up straight and attentive. "I understand."

Dan groaned. Make that two locks. Padlocks. And an extra-large wire cage to put the spider cage inside that. Just in case. “I’m going to regret asking this, but, the name-”

Maze smiled even wider. “It means _ pudding._”

He visibly twitched. 

Lucifer groaned. “It does not. There’s no pudding in Hell. But it’s close enough, I suppose.”

“No pudding in…? Well, I guess _ that _ just makes sense. And I can’t believe I’m saying anything you’ve ever said makes sense.”

“Well, with a bit of luck, you’ll avoid Hell and the lack of pudding there.”

“And we’re back to not making sense.”

“I’m sure you’ll understand when you stop getting older.”

Dan just squinted at him. He looked down at his beer bottle and pushed it and the last bit of liquid at the bottom away. 

Ella let everyone up for another quick break but didn’t get up herself, scribbling some notes behind her GM screen. Dan stayed while Chloe took a turn to fuss over Charlie in the other room with Trixie tagging along. When Ella closed her GM book again, he said, “hey, thanks for doing this. I got the feeling that you didn’t really mean to invite me. I haven’t gotten out in a real group setting in a while, and this has been nice.”

She looked up, meeting his eyes. “It’s all good, now. At the time, yeah, I thought you were being a little pushy, but I should have asked you too.”

“No, I shouldn’t have made you feel like you had to. It’s _ your _ game. Just because I’ve played before doesn’t mean you have to add me.”

Ella smiled more easily. “Okay, but you owe me a coffee.”

“Er.”

“Not like a date or anything, dude, just bring me some good stuff next week at work and we’ll call it even. And if Chloe is cool with having more of these, I’ll invite you, k?”

“Okay. Hey, if Chloe doesn’t want to do this again, would you consider running more sessions anyway, maybe at a game shop? I think Trixie’s having fun.”

She gave him a smirk. “Are _ you _ having fun?”

Dan thought about giving her a glib answer but opted for honesty. “Yeah, I am. I need people I can call friends. Amenadiel and Linda having Charlie reminded me that life will go on without me if I let it. And even if I think Lucifer is insane - he keeps coming back.”

“Maze is pretty awesome too. You should ask her out.”

“_Maze_?”

“Yeah, you guys have a few things in common.”

“I don’t know if Maze... dates.”

“You never know unless you ask.”

“Sure, and get my head bit off if she doesn’t.”

Mazikeen picked that exact moment to lean down between them. “Meet me at the Karaoke bar. You’re buying drinks. Tomorrow night at eight.”

Then she was gone again. 

Dan cleared his throat unnecessarily. “Uh. She meant me, right?”

Ella watched her saunter away to the kitchen area. “I mean, if you want, I could stop by around nine to see how you’re doing.”

He almost said he didn’t need anyone to do that, but this was Maze. “Do you know which bar she meant?”

“I’m _ pretty _ sure it’s the one just a few blocks from LUX - the one we go to on Tribe night sometimes. There’s one further away with better drink specials, but It kind of depends on how many of us are in heels.”

“I have no idea what that means.”

She slapped his shoulder lightly. “I pray you never do.”

“Thanks, I think.” Dan looked over his shoulder to see Maze drinking directly from a bottle of vodka. “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Yes,” she tilted her head, “but if it _ does _ turn out to be a bad idea, she won’t take it personally. Probably. She needs to get Eve out of her system. You probably need someone you can blow off some real steam with. The couple times I saw her while Luce was gone, she seemed...pissed."

“You aren’t exactly selling this.”

“Oh relax. At worst, you’ll probably get lucky.”

“I...we actually did work pretty well together, but did you say ‘Eve?’”

“Lucifer’s _ ex-girlfriend _? Remember?”

“I honestly was trying not to pay too much attention to her. She seemed kinda punchy, and I swear Lucifer actually _ improved _ when they broke up. But, her name was _ Eve _?”

“Honestly, it’s a lot easier to just go with it.”

Dan ducked his head closer and whispered, “Does _ Mazikeen _ have some sort of reference I’m not getting?”

“It means ‘demon’ in a few languages. I wouldn’t sweat it.”

He looked doubtful. “I’m still not sure if you’re actually helping me or not.”

Ella wet her lips and sat back a little. “We both let things get weird after, and I can’t stand not being friends over...well.”

Dan raised his eyebrows. “A terrible mistake? Not that you aren’t, you know, attractive-”

Ella spoke at the same time he did, “a dumb spur-of-the-moment thing? Yeah. Plus, Chloe-”

“Sorry.”

“Sorry.”

They grinned at each other ruefully, but the tension was gone, or at least retreating. Neither noticed that Lucifer hadn’t gotten up just yet, checking his phone. He looked at them askance, apparently missing most of the conversation. “What on earth are you two talking about?”

Dan and Ella blushed, replying, “_nothing!_” at the same time.

Lucifer vacated his seat to get away from the weirdness and nearly ran straight into Chloe who was carrying a sleepy Charlie in her arms. He made a complicated dodge move that left him face to face with Linda, who had put down her notepad and was unbuttoning her blouse. He grinned down at her. “Doctor, I don’t think this is that kind of party, not that I object. They might, however.”

Linda responded slowly, “Lucifer, I need to feed Charlie.”

“Yes, of course. But _ en flagrante_?” He looked around for a bottle. 

Chloe rolled her eyes at Lucifer, handing the child over to Linda. She made herself comfortable on the couch with a pillow under her elbow and Charlie and starting doing what nature demanded.

Lucifer blinked. “What is happening?”

Amenadiel settled near Linda, leaving her space to be comfortable. “You get used to it pretty quickly. Even if Maze hasn’t. She asked to try it and Linda won’t let her.”

“I understood there was no need for the female to behave as a..._ heifer _ any longer.”

Chloe touched his lower back. “I breastfed Trixie when I could - she switched back and forth a bit and it worked out. There’s really no good reason to go either way, as long as the baby is getting enough nutrition, but it’s nice to have that extra skin contact.” She watched Charlie fondly. “Even if it makes you sore as hell. No pun intended.”

“Detective? Are you trying to get me to view your breasts differently? It’s rather difficult for me to think about doing things to them when I know where they’ve been.”

Dan unhelpfully muttered, “that’s what she said,” and then immediately realized he was referring to his _ ex-wife’s _ breasts and pinched his nose in embarrassment.

Ella laugh-snorted under her breath.

Chloe looked up to make sure Trixie was still keeping herself occupied then responded to Lucifer, “okay, that’s enough talk about boobs.” _ Especially when you haven’t done anything with mine so far. _ She tried not to let her mind wander down that road. 

Trixie returned from her room with Miss Alien, holding her up. “Hey, I wanted to loan her to Charlie.”

Amenadiel gently accepted the doll. “Why’s that, sweetheart?”

The girl hedged. “She’s afraid of spiders. So she should be with Charlie instead. For when I get a pet spider.”

Linda grinned over Amenadiel’s confusion. “Thank you very much, Trixie, Charlie will love her. And just know that you can have her back anytime she isn’t afraid of spiders anymore, okay?”

Amenadiel looked at the toy for another few seconds, then propped it up next to Linda and Charlie. “Thank you, Trixie. I guess that means you should come visit Miss Alien once in a while so she doesn't miss you."

Trixie nodded seriously. “Of course I will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. That's two "that's what she said" jokes in one game session. There may be another.
> 
> Remind me to tell you sometime about how our party made of dragons started a dire beaver fur farm.
> 
> An aside, I have no idea if 11-12 year olds act like that.


	5. Storming the Castle. Or the Moat House. Whatever

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The party gets back in gear, and fights another monster amid spurts of Deckerstar.

Chloe fought back a tiny sniffle.

Lucifer gave her a worried look. “Are you feeling well?”

“Trixie is kind of getting the younger brother she always wanted.”

He snorted. “Siblings aren’t all they’re cracked up to be.”

“I wouldn't know, I was an only kid. Sometimes I think you _ like _ Amenadiel. Surely there are a few others you’d like to see again.”

“If Charlie has to be half-angel, at least it’s half of one I enjoy spending time with. Amenadiel and I didn’t always get along. He’s tolerable now.”

She pulled him in for a side hug. He tensed then relented. He felt good without the layer of a suit coat in the way. The skin of his forearms rested over one of her hands and she mentally begged for him not to move, at least for a few more seconds.

Or maybe forever.

That’d be good too.

She let herself imagine for a few moments being wrapped up in his arms, skin on skin. Not the passionate writhing of the dream she had yet to tell him about, but simply being able to soak up his body heat in bed on a lazy morning. 

Not that she didn’t want both. But it still seemed so far away from happening. 

It’s like he was still afraid of breaking her. Like whatever Hell memories he brought back with him were somehow worse than all the time he spent running Hell previously up until his long vacation in LA. 

Maybe they were. She didn’t know because he wouldn’t tell her, but his body language spoke volumes.

As far as she knew, he hadn’t retreated to past behavior. She didn’t ask, but Maze volunteered that he hadn’t taken anyone to the penthouse since he got back. He spent all his free time getting the club running again, or at work at the precinct, with no time for play. He finally stopped looking _ tired _ a week ago, but his lifeforce was still a shadow of how she remembered him. 

They also hadn’t talked. She didn’t want to scare him away with an ill-timed ‘I love you’. She knew he spooked easily. 

Lucifer seemed to be doing his best to simply get back to work, actually throwing himself into the job for eight hours a day, even doing paperwork from day one. He had always been valuable as a partner for his insights, but now his efforts made him valuable to the entire precinct. 

On the other hand, he’d stopped flirting with everyone,_ including _ her, and it hurt her soul to see his light so dimmed. 

He’d talk when he was ready. He said so.

She got a grand total of five delicious seconds before he pulled away, looking at her with that fond/sad expression he’d been dragging around since he got back. Maybe he didn’t move away as far as last time, though.

Ella finished whatever she was doing with a thump of her books on the table. “Avengers, assemble!”

Everyone scurried back to their seats in an orderly fashion, Lucifer last. 

Chloe asked, “what’s next?

“So some of you guys are pretty badly hurt but you’re not really at a point where you can stop for the day - do you need some suggestions?”

Dan bit his tongue, but said, “Lucifer, you should have a spell for that.”

He snapped out of whatever his thought process was doing and actually looked down at his short spell list. “Oh, _ that’s _ useful. Yes, I do. He does. Whatever."

Ella said, “Lucas plays his lute and everyone feels rested. Amenadiel, that means you can do some more healing now, so can Chloe if you have any healing spells.”

Everyone spent a few minutes erasing and writing health point totals and got ready to move on.

Ella jotted something on a sticky note and passed it to Chloe, who unfolded it and read it with a slight frown. “Is this-”

“Shhh! That’s just for you.”

Dan immediately looked interested. “Do I notice-”

“Nope! Cool your jets, sparkles.”

Lucifer regarded Ella, “What’s this now?”

“I might sometimes inform one or more of the party members of something...pertinent to them. Kira has been informed of something, either through the gods or as a result of events.”

“You’re God in this scenario?”

She smiled sweetly, “I am a benevolent God. We aren’t playing _ Call of Cthulu _after all.” 

Dan shuddered. “Heard of it, never played it. It looked...daunting. I have played all evil characters in a party though, that was...interesting.”

Maze tented her fingers under her chin. “Oh?”

“Yeah, people can get really dark when they’re encouraged to be creative and your group is trying to take over the world.”

She tilted her head at him, “you’re more right than you know.”

Lucifer put in, “I encountered what you would have called ‘Cthulhu‘ once. It was destroyed early on in the universe - far too unstable to last long anyway. I wonder who talked to Lovecraft to inspire him to write about such a thing.”

After a moment, Dan gave him a snort and an obligatory, “you mean it _ wasn’t _you?”

“The universe is well rid of such a creature - it was more energy than _ living, _an unintentional offshoot of my Father and Mum when they set all of Creation in motion.

Ella started writing another note. Everyone looked at her attentively. She smirked and said, “you guys ready now?”

* * *

They caught up to DF quickly, following spider tracks and a trail of exsanguinated squirrels and chipmunks. Their elf left none behind - tracks or bodies. 

Peter the Giant Wolf Spider waited forlornly at the end of the path. It bounced in place when it saw them, lifting a leg to point at their (obvious) destination. 

Penny patted him and glanced up at Lucas, who shrugged.

Amrellon didn’t see any tracks from the rogue but suggested she probably continued on ahead for whatever reason. She probably saw a chance to take out a guard and took it.

The fact that _ they _ couldn’t find a body meant nothing. In either case, she wasn’t around.

The keep, if you could call it that, stood with moss-covered stone walls that didn’t make a complete circuit but was also surrounded by a ten-foot-wide moat. In its heyday, it was a well-known stopping point of travel. They could find the overgrown main road now, but it was clearly not in use by the general populace and hadn’t been for a long time. Lucas dredged up the knowledge from previous travelers who stayed at his inn - it had been over a century since it had been attacked and burned by who knows what - but it looked considerably repaired now. Not entirely though, with some roofs that had been burned off or caved in, the tops of the walls blackened by old fire and one fallen tower that crumbled into the moat, It didn’t quite make a bridge, but it might make a crossing easier. Under his breath, Lucas muttered, “it’s no Red Keep. Well, maybe _ now _ it is.”

Amrellon spit back, "spoilers."

Steve ignored him and quietly asked, “do we wait or charge the gate now or find another way in?”

Two humanoid creatures could be seen on duty inside the gate arch. The portcullis itself was down and blocking the entrance. Unless someone could shoot both guards, through the gate, from the edge of the woods, it would be difficult or impossible to get in that way.

Lucas thought otherwise, fuming and waiting impatiently.

Night had already begun to fall, and the dimming light would cover their movements if they decided to try the front gate. 

You know, as long as no one got impatient and rushed out, yelling things like ‘_Hello, miscreants who tried to murder my new friends and burn down my house!’ _

DF, hidden in the shadows of the portcullis, cursed and leaped out from behind the guard, stabbing one and dropping him before he knew what was happening. The second guard, watching his post mate go down in a spray of blood, ran inside, screaming of an attack at the top of his lungs.

Kira rubbed her forehead. “Well, so much for the element of surprise.”

Lucas’ antics drew panicked fire from two archers on the wall, so the party charged across the wooden bridge to join DF. Now that the arch was abandoned, she cranked the wheel that lifted the portcullis to let them inside. Steve held his shield over their heads as much as he could and several arrows strike the ground behind them as they run. DF kicked the body of the man she had stabbed for no real reason except out of frustration. He’s a hobgoblin, like the other guard who ran off yelling. 

The bard shrugged, “well, at least we’re all together again. What about the arseholes who shot at us?”

As if in response, an arrow struck and spun off nearby masonry. The ‘arseholes’ had moved along the wall to try to get a better shot. 

Kira grumbled. “I can’t climb the wall, but I can draw their fire. DF, can you and Lucas shoot back at them while the fighters charge out into the courtyard?” Penny nods and DF switches out to her crossbow while Lucas pulled out his.

“Hang on,” he quietly sang a spell of inspiration to improve their aim. Kira, Steve, and Penny run out, yelling a battle cry. DF and Lucas swing out of the protection of the stone arch after counting to three and take aim at the two hobgoblin archers on the wall. Each archer takes a bolt to the body while reloading their bows, but they don’t fall. Amrellon comes out last and splits his magic attack between the two targets and lands enough damage to knock them off the wall. They both tumble backward with a cry and a satisfactory thud. 

DF complained moodily, “I’ll have to circle around the outside wall now to loot the bodies.”

Kira pointed her longsword at the closest structure, an old stable. It has cover from any other archers that might run out from the second story or shoot from one of the standing towers. 

The party runs inside, Penny taking up the rear to cover the squishier members. She nearly tripped over Amrellon, who had come to a sudden stop just inside the stable doors, as the rest came to a stumbling halt in front of him.

In the second closest stall, a woman sits on the ground. She's small and thin, hugging her bent knees close to her body. It looks as if she’s been here for a while, dirty and tired. She’s holding onto herself thightly, unmoving and taking little notice of them. 

Lucas crouched down to her level while Penny kept guard, watching outside for any returning and alert inhabitants of the keep. He sat on his heels at the edge of the stall, holding a hand out. “Hello, dear, are you alright?”

She pursed her lips, looking at him with a blank stare that slowly softened.

DF stepped forward, looking around at everything, but especially the woman, pulling her dagger.

* * *

Maze crossed her arms. “It’s a trap.”

Dan looked up at the ceiling. 

Chloe looked doubtful. “How do you know it’s a trap?”

She shrugged. “Everything is a trap.”

Ella put her chin in her hand, her elbow on the table. “You know how when you go to the movies, and you’re sure something is going to happen a certain way, but you watch it anyway?”

The demon tilted her head. 

“It’s like that. And not everything is a trap. She might be a prisoner. She might be-”

“She’s not a prisoner.”

“C’mon, you don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do.”

“Okay, how can you tell?”

Maze ticked off her fingers, “she’s not chained up, she’s in an old, moldy stall, she didn’t run away when the commotion started - either towards us or away from us, so I bet anyone at this table ten bucks she’s a shapeshifting monster. I helped run Hell for a long time - I know a prisoner, or a monster, when I see one.”

Ella looked a little disappointed, sighing. “Okay, yes, those are all very good points. But can you try to remember that you aren’t your character and vice versa? Just because your character is chaotic doesn’t mean she’s also reckless. Even if you’re right, you can’t just go stabbing and punching everyone who _ looks _ suspicious.”

“What makes you think that's my plan?”

“Alright, fine, what is DF planning on doing?”

“Stabbing her.”

Ella pinched the bridge of her nose tightly. “Okay, so, would anyone here like to try to stop DF from skewering the poor girl?”

Trixie bit her lip but said, “I’m in the back and don’t see it.”

“Hey, good work, Trixie gets a point for roleplaying. Anyone else?”

Dan added, “I’m in the back with her and the other armored fighters are in front of me. I doubt I can even see around them, much less the girl on the ground.”

Lucifer and Chloe looked at each other. He said, “I’d like...to try to stop her.”

Maze gave him a dirty look.

Chloe nodded, “I”m going to try to step in front of DF, or at least put my sword between her and the woman.”

“Okay, guys, DF, if you’re completely determined to attack her here and now, I’ll have you, Kira and Lucas make simple dexterity checks against each other - all of you roll your 20’s and add your dexterity bonuses. If DF wins, she’s going to continue to try to attack, and if Lucas or Kira wins, it stops the attack. Amenadiel?”

He rubbed his chin, looking at his own bonuses. “Steve is going to hold back, just in case she’s right after all and it is a trap."

“Dice up, here we go.”

* * *

DF lunges forward, eyes and blade flashing. 

Kira is a step late, stabbing her sword into the ground and leaving herself open. 

Lucas tried to grab DF’s arm and manages to do so only after her dagger sinks into the flesh of the woman.

She hisses a breath, reaches out and touches Kira, casting a spell without so much as a spoken word.

Kira grunts in not-exactly-surprise, trying and failing to dodge the woman’s grasping hand. An aura flashes around her form and fades, leaving Kira looking weakened. Steve concentrates a half-second and yells, “she casts curses!”

DF snarls, “I _ knew _ it was a trap!”

The woman’s form shimmered - while not entirely a _ shapeshifter _, she did lose her illusion of being human. The top half of her body rises a few feet, revealing the bottom half as that of a tawny lion. Her sets of claws unsheathe and she crouches, taking a long step backward, snarling.

Steve, ready to attack, swings his mace hard at her side. He catches her in mid-step, and his mace glows with holy energy as it connects. The spider venom adds a bit more damage on top of everything else.

After that, it's short work to take her down. She's able to lash out one more time with her claws but DF dances out of the way as the monster attacks. Kira got in the last hit, weaker than it should have been for her, but it's enough to take out the monster.

The rogue spots a ring around one of the digits on her front paws and she pulls it off triumphantly. “Hey, what’s this do?”

Amrellon, finally in a position to see everything, concentrates on the item. “Well, it’s magical. I can’t tell you what it does yet, but we should probably hold off on testing it.”

DF looked about to argue but pocketed it for later.

The wizard pointed at the back of the stall, “there’s something else there too.”

DF pounced, tearing up handfuls of moldy straw until she uncovers more items. One is a new clay jug with a wide mouth and stopper and another is a simple wooden token with a tree engraved on it. Under all of it is a small pile of gold coins. “Do you not know what these are, or is there actually a good reason to have you along?”

He ignored her remark, taking the jug and grinning. “This will pour water for as long as you hold it open, indefinitely. That coin there will grow an enormous tree wherever you drop it on the ground and activate it. It would block the archway to the keep if we had to make a fast exit, for example.” 

She side-eyed him but gave him both items. “Fine, you hang on to these. I don’t want to accidentally impale myself on a tree shooting up out of nowhere."

No one but Penny and Amrellon looked terribly impressed by the items. The wizard happily pocketed the odd token. Kira assumed he knew what he was doing. She didn’t see a use for them yet, but the first magic item she’d encountered nearly burned down a building. 

He passed the jug to Lucas, who raised an eyebrow. “You hang on to this - I shouldn’t have both items, plus it’s heavy.”

Lucas smiled in a way that had Amrellon immediately regretting his decision. The handsome bard said, “are you suggesting I need a bath?”

“What? No. When you run out of spells it might be useful.”

“To do what with, make a puddle and throw mud at someone?"

“If you don’t want it, give it to someone else then.”

“If Dad had used this instead of sending a flood, we’d only be up to it in our ankles by now.”

Steve smirked. “Give it here, maybe I can use it the next time I’m standing around waiting after Kira takes down whatever’s in front of her and I don’t have anything to swing at.”

Lucas shrugged and passed it to him. “I once knew a fellow who would have a field day with endless water. He could have used it to put local wineries out of business.”

The wizard rolled his eyes. “Are you done?”

His eyes lit up. “For now. I believe we still have someone we need to find and bludgeon.”

Lucifer looked fiercely at the hand-drawn map on the table as if it had personally wronged _ him _. 

Chloe very deliberately didn’t draw his attention - it was the first time in weeks she’d seen him so determined. He did catch her smiling broadly at him, and luckily, he found it infectious rather than suspicious.

He smiled at her and her heart warmed all over. “Something funny, Detective?”

She answered honestly, “I love seeing you have a good time. It reminds me of our Monopoly nights and how much Trixie and I enjoyed having you over for dinner and board games.” 

“You did?” Lucifer looked like he was torn between recalling the happier memories and shoving them back down. She remembered how hurt he looked when he tried to re-enact those memories with her in this apartment, his desperation that overshadowed what should have been a sweet attempt to show her how he felt. 

How much he wanted that again, and how badly she had misunderstood him. She was happy he was back, physically, but she wanted her impish Devil back too. “Yes. I know you’ve been busy, but maybe sometime next week, we can do it again? Just us? Me, you and Trixie? Like we used to.”

His smile, while brittle, was also more real than the face he’d been putting on at work. “You want that? Even after everything?”

She squeezed his wrist to keep his attention before either of them went too far down that rabbit hole. “Hey, remember what I said on your balcony? I meant it.”

Some panic receded from his eyes, replaced by curiosity, maybe even hope. “I meant what I said too.”

Before he could react, she leaned up and kissed his cheek with a small smile. “Good. Now let’s get the bad guy, together, like we always do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more big fight to go, maybe two.


	6. Experience Points

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wrapping up this story! Party has a few close calls, everyone wants to play again.

Unseen things skittered in the darkness. 

Inside the main door of the keep, they could see unlit torches all down the hallway. DF found multiple tracks from inhabitants, but she couldn’t be sure if any were left in the last hour. It was entirely possible any remaining guards had withdrawn deeper to put up a fortified front rather than be picked off in small groups.

There was nowhere to go now, but forward. 

Peter crowded under the legs of Penny, rubbing against her leg like a very creepy cat. 

The giant spider protectively but ineffectually chittered at a rat that dared to get too close. Apparently 30 feet was ‘too close.’

The elf led the way, completely in her preferred element - looking for traps, listening to every sound and sliding between shadows. 

Unfortunately, most of the party was making an absolute racket behind her. She waved them off , signaling them to not try to match her speed, and went further ahead, trying to keep enough space to properly scout but not be so far ahead she couldn’t run back to them if she needed to. 

Steve spoke a quiet word and a dim light flicked into existence above his head, floating along with the non-stealthy party members. Even if they can’t hide, they won’t be attacked unawares. 

At least they won’t be blind while defending themselves. 

DF returned, tilting her head back the way she came. “There’s a staircase going down that has weird sounds coming from it, and this hallway goes to a door that’s been barricaded with a bunch of guys inside. A guy shot at me from an arrow slit next to the door, but he missed. I don’t think they’re coming out on their own.”

Kira sighed. “Okay, do you have any suggestions?”

Her reply came quickly, somewhat disturbingly so, at least to Kira, “set the door on fire from the outside, and go downstairs while they deal with it. They’ll either have to open the door to unbarricade it or the door will burn down and we’ll have solved our problem.” 

"That...actually sounds effective. Maybe we should go around to the back of the keep and make sure there's no back door they can escape from before we do anything?"

She grumbled her assent. “If they’re all holed up in there though, we should check the other doors and make sure no one follows us out. Anyone know how big this place actually is?”

Lucas tilted his head, thinking about it. “The three towers up ahead looked defensive rather than for living quarters - but no one shot at us from them.”

Steve agreed, “so this place is undermanned. Either his other minions are out in the field or their leader isn’t as big a deal as Raff thought.”

The paladin looked down the hallway. “What do you guys think - check out the stairs first and make sure no one is going to ambush us if we storm the barricaded strong room? We risk them escaping if we wait.”

Amrellon offered a suggestion, “what if DF sneaks around back to look for a secret escape route? She can take my familiar with her and send her back to me when she’s in position. She can take Peter too. We can take one of the tables from the entryway and use it for a shield to get close enough to the door to set fire to it.”

Kira wasn’t thrilled with the idea. It could still take a long time to burn through the barricaded door, and chances are they might have an escape route already. Splitting the party in half reduced their survivability, too. She had another thought, “hang on, can we use one of the fire beads to destroy the barricade?"

The wizard grinned widely and the bard echoed it with a feral look in his eyes. “Yes. Yes, we can.”

* * *

The two spellcasters huddled up behind the table. The top faced the barricaded door and Amrellon complained that they should have used two tables. 

Lucas retorted that this one single table was much sturdier and provided better cover than any of the others, and it wasn’t his fault if the wizard had problems getting cozy with the bard.

They bickered so much getting into position that a goblinoid voice spoke from the arrow slit, “Oy!”

They exchanged a glance. Amrellon yelled back, “Yeah?”

“How ‘bout you mind your own business and leave us be.”

“That depends. You guys gonna stop hunting paladins?”

“We’ll throw our coins out into the hall - take ‘em and leave.”

At the same time, Lucas and Amrellon looked at each other and said, “they’re stalling.”

The wizard grunted, but responded loudly, “sure, throw them out here and we’ll take our table and go.”

Lucas said, “why on earth would we do that?”

“ _ Bluffing, you idiot.” _

“Hmph.”

Cam the snake slithered up just then, holding a yellow flower in her mouth and curling back up in Amrellon’s pocket. He scritched her head with one finger. “That’s the signal.”

Pulling the cord of glass beads out of his pocket, Amrellon selected one from the end and hefted it, rolling it in his palm. 

The bard actually looked  _ nervous. _ “Are you sure you can handle that thing? Maybe I should wait back with the others…”

“Too late, my fellow squishy friend. Just stay down and you’ll be fine.”

He lofted it over the edge and they both ducked. The barricaded door shattered even more spectacularly than the bar back at the inn.

Splinters exploded around them, pinging off the sturdy table. It held, as expected,  rattling and moving  only a little with the shockwave of magical force. 

Smoke filled the room and the hallway, providing cover for both sides. Bolts flew from arrow slits, thudding harmlessly into the solid table and sticking.

Amrellon and Lucas hid behind the barrier while the three warriors charged around it. Penny barrelled through the debris of the shattered door, running over a hobgoblin and trampling him into the floor with a squelching crunch. 

Steve and Kira attacked the archers to either side of the door, who had been taking potshots at the table. Both crumpled to the ground with single strikes.

Half a dozen more hobgoblins jumped them, screaming obscenities. 

The wizard put one of them to sleep with a well-aimed spell, and Lucas nearly accidentally hit Steve with a crossbow bolt in friendly fire. 

The Dragonborn spit acid in the face of one of the remaining combatants and he more or less melted in a pile of liquifying flesh on the spot. 

The short battle resulted in little damage to the heroes, leaving eight dead hobgoblins on the floor. Lucas found the trapdoor that led outside where DF waited, gleefully sitting on the chest of her unconscious victim. 

Steve wrinkled his nose. “Is that the guy?”

Kira panted, catching up and focusing on the man. “Yeah, or one of the bad guys. He’s evil. Actually  _ evil _ , that is, according to my magic. Nice work, DF.”

She shrugged nonchalantly, stepping up and offering her holy symbol back to the Paladin. “No sign of Raff.”

Accepting it with a sigh of relief, she tucked it back around her neck.

Lucas remarked, “happy to be reunited with your god, m’ lady?”

“I never lost Lathlander, just my holy symbol. But I do need it to cast some of my spells. Is everyone in one piece?”

“Is this the man responsible for the damage to my inn?”

“Probably. We won’t know until we question him. Looks like DF hit him over the head pretty good. In the meantime, we should clear out the dead bodies and tie him up. I think our rogue can handle binding him while the rest of us keep watch and investigate the room he was in.”

“You can take the detective out of the building…”

She grinned. “Unless you have a better idea, Lucas?”

He paused, looking around and counting heads. “Where’s Mini-Merlin?”

* * *

Dan grumped, “are you  _ kidding _ me?”

Ella shrugged. “You’re the one who failed his saving throw.”

“You aren’t just getting back at me for anything?”

“Stuff happens when you don’t pay attention to your surroundings.”

“But I was paying attention!”

“Not according to your d20.”

Chloe looked between them, concerned. 

Lucifer raised an eyebrow, “oh, did he die?”

Their game runner rubbed her hands together and pointed at the mat, where the Monopoly car had been whisked off the table. “Well, you don’t see him here.”

The Devil very deliberately looked at Dan, who glared back. “Is this another one of those ‘he’s not here’ things?”

“Yes, exactly! Peter is missing too, by the way, but there’s no sign of blood from either of them,” Ella drew a new (disturbingly red) line with a marker, “but Maze can easily see where the drag marks are from his unconscious (probably) body.”

Trixie breathed in relief and Dan didn’t ask who she was more worried about. 

“So, what do you guys want to do?”

Maze sighed. “I guess this is where I use my rogue-y powers for good and try to track them?”

* * *

Their wizard had been dragged off by a giant spider, leaving behind tracks wide enough to take up most of the hallway. The trail ended at a solid door that had to have been closed by a being with some dexterity; it was locked.

Outside the chamber, they heard the muffled movements of what had to be the biggest spider any of them had ever considered might exist.

The party retreated a few feet back to make hasty plans. DF and Lucas conversed quietly over whether or not his charm spell could deal with a creature that large. 

Kira and Steve dug through their few magical scrolls to see if they could bolster their defenses before charging through.

Penny grumbled and fidgeted in place, ready to break down the door herself. “Can’t we just go in?”

Kira sighed sympathetically, “if DF can unlock the door without anyone noticing, we have a better chance at catching whoever is on the other side by surprise. We don’t know how many enemies are in there, either.”

Pressing an ear up to their side of the door, DF confirmed that a huge spider (or something else with eight legs) waited on the other side and that at least one humanoid was in there with it. She believes Amrellon might be there too, but if so, he’s either very quiet or unmoving. 

DF picks the lock deftly, looking back to make sure everyone is in place and ready before throwing the door open. After some last-second back and forth, Steve casts a scroll to protect them against dark magic and Kira makes ready to smite the first thing she can, holding her sword with purpose.

Everyone sucks in a breath and DF threw the door open with a bang that makes it bounce on its hinges. 

The creature is somewhat bigger than a standard Giant Wolf Spider. It doesn’t quite crowd the space, but fangs point down from over their heads. And over the wizard’s head in particular, who is on the ground, bound in webs.

Lucas smirks, “If you  _ wanted _ to be tied up, all you had to do was ask.”

The man in black and purple robes doesn’t appear to be the least bit surprised. He shouts a magical word and thick spider webs spring up around the party as they enter, limiting their movements. DF dodged the whipping silk, leaping clear, and moving to run at the caster. 

Penny breaks free with a roar and a mouthful of acid, spitting and melting webs around her. She charged the caster, barely missing him as he splits into three mirror images. Her sword sweeps through him harmlessly and her shout is  nearly unintelligible.

The enormous spider steps away from Amrellon, hissing at the new prey entangled in webs. 

DF altered her direction in mid-stride, passing the spider entirely and dropping to a knee to free the wizard, who looked shocked at his rescue. She grumbled, “don’t get cocky. We need a wizard to fight a wizard, probably.”

“Thanks!”

“Or at least more moving targets. As long as you’re alive, you should at least make yourself useful.”

“...Right.” 

Steve huffed and broke free next, moving toward a copy of the  enemy- mage picked at random. Or not the one Penny found to be an illusion, anyway. 

The spider lunged as Steve edged into range, striking with a bite that nearly knocked him off his feet and out of his boots. From behind it, Amrellon muttered a spell but stayed back. His snake, however, slithered into position and bit down on one of the spider’s back legs, delivering a helping of shocking damage that sent tendrils of lighting up the leg, and freezing it where it stood. 

Making a quick mental calculation, Kira picks one of the two remaining dark mage clones and charges him. Smiling cooly, he reacts, targeting her with evil magic that  reaches out to her with strands of black fire that encircles her limbs, twisting and tightening until they touch her. 

She  drops  to the ground in a gasping heap.

* * *

“Detective!”

Dan swore he saw fire out of the corner of his eye.

Lucifer’s whole body clenched. He made himself breathe out while everyone turned to look at him. He ignored them. “I need to run over and help her!”

Ella sighed sympathetically. “It’s not your turn, dude, sorry.”

His brother scratched his neck worriedly, “it’s not mine either, right?” 

“No, sorry, Maze is up next.”

Dan took pity on Lucifer, patting his shoulder lightly and pointed to her damage. “Hey, she’s just down, not dead, right?”

Chloe held up her sheet helpfully, “I'm only mostly dead. I'm at one health point."

Lucifer still looked nervous. "That can't be good."

Ella cackled. "Oh, it's really not. She's dead in 2 rounds unless you can fix her curse."

"Curse? Detective, why didn't you say anything? What curse?"

Chloe tapped her post-it note. "I got cursed by the cat-woman thing. I didn't want to slow down the party and we needed to finish our mission."

Amenadiel looked at her. "As long as we wrap this up, I, or that is, Steve can heal you again, but we better get back to a town right away."

His brother fidgeted. "You can't let her die, Ella!"

"Oh relax, dude, you're only one down, you got this."

"Yes, but, she's in mortal danger!"

“Only kind of.”

Chloe grimaced. “Lucifer, can I talk to you for a second? Ella?”

“Uhm, sure, Luce looks too distracted, and you're down for the count, we can take a second to regroup.” She looked from her to Lucifer, “if it’s just a second?” 

She tugged Lucifer up and away from the table, pulling him to the side of the room. "What's going on? Is this a Hell thing?"

He rocked back and forth on his heels, looking anywhere but at her. "You know I'd prefer not to say."

“So, you’re still thinking about it? Hell?”

“Of course I’m thinking about it. I just can’t...I can’t.”

“What?” Chloe dragged Lucifer further into the apartment, away from the group. “Why can’t we just  _ be _ together, Lucifer? How does Hell factor into this?  B ecause it clearly does.”

He sighed, “If I tell you... “

“_Te_ _ ll me _ . You’re going to make me lose my mind if you don’t. I need to know what you want, your desires.”

He didn’t quite meet her gaze. “I want you.”

“What’s going on then?”

“Perhaps right now isn’t the best time.”

“There  _ is  _ no best time. There never is.”

He hedged. “Detective. I have to go back to Hell. Just not right away.”

“When? How long do I have you for?”

He blinked back tears that threatened to well up. “Until you...pass on. Once that happens, I have to go back to Hell. Permanently.”

She looked back at him, processing the words he said. She put her own words together carefully before speaking. One thing at a time, then the rest. “Lucifer, that’s the deal most of us  _ get. _ ‘Until death do us part.’”

“But your job is dangerous. You could die  _ tomorrow _ , for any reason. For no reason at all.  _ Germs _ can kill you.”

“That’s never been any different than the rest of my life. Wait, are you afraid of going back to hell early? Is that it?”

“I’m...I don’t want to lose you again. If I give you my heart, it’s just going to break harder next time. And I'll be truly without you."

“We can have each other right now and we can figure out the Hell thing later, together. Find a way around it. Maybe I’ll find a way to see you in Hell, or-”

“I never want to see you there.  _ Ever. _ Not for one second.”

She tried to joke, but it fell flat. “Even as your queen?”

He replied seriously, however, “not even that. You don’t belong there. You never have and you never will.”

Chloe smiled and kissed the corner of his mouth. "Lucifer, I  _ want _ to be  _ with you _ . Even if it's just until tomorrow."

He gave her a sly look, "why, is that a proposal?"

He intended it to be a disarming joke. Chloe took both his hands in hers. "Yes. Even if something happens sooner than we think. I want tomorrow morning with you, I want to wake up with you. I want every tomorrow with you. For as long as I have. Lucifer Morningstar, will you marry me?"

Unbeknownst to them, the rest of the room had fallen dead silent, the game forgotten.

Then Amenadiel said, “Damn. I should have said that instead. Not the Lucifer part though.”

Linda, who had moved next to her boyfriend, elbowed the hell out of him. 

Dan yelled, “I’m throwing the bachelor party!”

Maze growled, “like  _ hell  _ you are.” She looked him over. “You can help me plan it though.”

“You have to be the best man to throw the party, Maze!”

“Hey, Luce, can I be your best man?”

He ignored her. 

Trixie was vibrating so hard her chair was shaking.

Lucifer looked down at his Detective, speaking softly, “I’ve never done anything like that before. I don’t know if I can.”

“You can try. I want you to.”

His heart was filling and breaking at the same time. What if he lost her again? It was a foregone conclusion - he would. “Chloe,  _ most _ people don’t know that this is all they have. Most people believe they’re only committing to a short time period.”

“From your perspective, it’s short. Not mine. Even so, that’s what makes it all the more precious. Even if.” She took a deep breath, but spoke quietly, “Lucifer, even if you do have to go back, I want you to have love, and memories of me and Trixie. And Dan and Ella and Linda and Charlie and everyone. You can’t enjoy your remaining time here if you’re afraid for me. You’re going to protect me anyway, you might as well do it by my side.”

He was quiet a moment longer, then smiled softly. "Well, where's the ring then?" 

She laughed, smiling, "we can pick some out together. Is that a 'yes?'"

"No churches."

"After what your dad did to you? We can manage just fine without one."

He hugged her. "I love you." Raising his voice, he added across the room, "no traditional bachelor parties, but I'm sure something can be arranged."

Chloe squeezed him, burying her face in his neck. "Don't worry. You're not going back there, even if it means I figure out a way to live forever."

Somehow, he knew she meant it. And that they might even come up with a solution.

Ella crossed her arms, at war with being both ecstatic and annoyed simultaneously. "Well. I guess we can finish this another time."

Dan pushed his car token around on the mat. "Man. I guess you'll have to schedule a night so we can wrap it up."

"Hah. Like you guys are anywhere  _ near _ the end."

“Isn't this the boss fight?"

She beamed. "Hardly. You guys have  _ so _ much fighting ahead of you. I could be doing this for  _ months. _ Right now, we should at least finish this up so you guys can regroup.”

Chloe let go. Slightly. "I do want Kira to get patched up…" Nothing had really changed, had it? Game tonight. Elope tomorrow. Or something. As much as she wanted to kick everyone out and take her devil to bed, it didn’t really seem fair at this point. 

Lucifer frowned. "There's  _ more _ ? You're going to subject me to this  _ again _ ?"

"C'mon, you're enjoying this. Just admit it."

"I suppose we can't let the villain continue to murder innocents. It’s likely he’ll take revenge on some poor souls in retaliation for our rampage if we don’t finish what we started-"

Before he could go all  _ devil _ on her, she cut in, "that's the spirit! Go Team Lightbringer."

Chloe giggled at Lucifer's expression. "Kira's name, remember?"

Dan snorted and tried not to look excited about resuming the game. “I’d like to stand up sometime today. I’m pretty sure I cast that last spell from the ground. Go Team Lightbringer, I guess. What’s next?”

* * *

Kira lay still on the ground, breathing harshly. 

DF rolled her eyes, ran over and dumped a healing potion down Kira’s throat. “Someone is paying me back for that.” Her good deed earned her an attack from the evil wizard, but she dodged it deftly. 

They identified the correct target at least. 

Steve struck, making solid contact and causing enough damage to make the mage crumple and spit out a curse as he died - not with a spell this time. 

The spider broke free, lunging to assist its master. Lucas intercepted it with a crossbow bolt, causing it to drip ichor and tumble into the nearest wall, dead. It shrank to ‘dog-sized’ and Penny sighed sadly. “Aww.”

Their wizard finally stood up, dropping his bindings to the ground and looking for a target. Both were dead. “How are we going to question him?”

DF opened her mouth, shook her head at nothing, then said, “we got the other guy. Hopefully he’ll do. Thanks for nothing, by the way.”

“I helped!”

“Don’t get caught next time!”

“I didn’t plan on getting clubbed over the head the first time.”

“Nevermind. Let’s get our loot and move on.”

Lucas paused to pet the spider, a soft expression on his face. “I didn’t know it was Peter.”

The Dragonborn sighed again. “It’s okay. I didn’t either until the spell broke.”

“A little help please?” Kira’s still on her back in full armor. “This stuff weighs a ton.”

“Of course, Detective!” Lucas scampered over, wiping his hands off on his clothes before he bent down to help her. 

“I’m not - you know, nevermind. Thank you.”

The party made their way back out of the old keep slowly. Steve threw their still knocked out captive from earlier over the back of the packhorse. Kira removed her armor and sat her mount, weakly.

Lacking any other mounts (the bad guys had none), the group decided to stay together, making their way to the nearest, largest town. 

Lucas walked with a hand on Kira’s mount, watching her worriedly. “You sure you’re alright?”

“I’ll be fine, as long as we don’t get attacked on the way to town. Even then, I know you’ll be here to protect me.”

“Oh? Are you putting a little less faith in your God?”

She smirked. “Not at all. But you’re here and Lathander isn’t. Until you start giving me spells when I pray to you, I still need my faith in Him.”

He made a face. “Let’s not go down that road.”

“Yeah, we’ll stick with this one.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone is wondering, this series will be/stay canon-compliant through S4- no OT3 or sexy Lucidan here. Daze may not even work out, but we'll see.

**Author's Note:**

> Some of my best friends are gamers. My husband is - no lie - the best GM I've ever played with. He has game testing credit in 4th ed. If you've never played before, I hope you will consider at least picking up one of the easy set-up box games like Ravenloft, if not a real three book starter set for player gaming - all you really need are dice, paper, and pencils. Player tokens really can be used from anywhere, as can monsters and sometimes it’s even more fun that way and I’ll never judge anyone who just wants to play however they want/can. I cut my teeth on 3.5e but it is a labor of love to play; 5e is so much nicer to new players. It really is a lot of fun and I don't plan on stopping any time soon.
> 
> One last thing, How Lucifer got out will be explained, but not until the end.


End file.
